Exit 63
by BlackBird73
Summary: Her existence was quiet and uneventful until he moved in next door. Now she would enjoy every summer. What will happen, as they get older will they grow up or grow apart.
1. Chapter 1

Nothing special, my existence really isn't notable in any way. I didn't make friends easily, I heard my Mom telling someone that the other kids just didn't take to me. I was quiet; I listened to music instead of doing almost anything else. I didn't go to my friend's houses no one came to mine. It was just the way it was. I am a good student; school is easy for me, now socially that is another story.

I am similar to my Dad, although he is outgoing at work. He is a businessman, I have no idea really what kind of business, he goes to work and is home for dinner every night. I adore my Dad; we both love music and use it as an escape. My Mom is an artist. She is a free spirit, and is willing to try anything once. I wish I could be more like my Mom. She and a few artist friends run a little storefront shop where they sell art, and have classes for kids. But every summer, starting the day after school ends we embark on our summer journey. We pack up our car with everything we will need and head to the shore. We have a little cottage house in Manahawkin New Jersey. Two hours from our actually home. My Dad takes off as much time as he can come down every weekend and a full week around my birthday. Mostly it's just my Mom and I, day in and day out. We go to the beach most days walk along the water swim and look for treasures. We visit shops but our favorite is the Light House (Old Barney). My Mom actually a talk to it like it's a person, its kind of funny or weird depending on how open-minded you are. We can spend hours there watching the boats traveling in and out of the ocean. I love LBI, it's all I have ever known, it is everything I could want calm and peaceful it is the exception to my dull existence.

Our house is on the bay and I love to sit on the dock and watch the boats traveling around thinking up my own stories of who was on them and where they are going. At night I sit out there just listening to the water. Our neighborhood stayed the same for the most part. The same families would come every year, lots of kids I couldn't tell you much about them. I never really interacted with any of them. I could hear them running up and down the street, riding bikes swimming, but I never joined them. My Mom would encourage me to try and fit in. I was either in my own world or with my parents.

When Dad was with us our evenings were filled with listening to records and dancing around singing to my Mom as she would paint or sketch what we saw that day. He loved the flea market, going to the ocean at the crack of dawn, crabbing off the dock he was a big kid when he was here.

It was the last weekend of June the summer between my 5th and 6th grade. I was helping my Mom in her garden in the front of the house when a car pulled up next door. The house had been empty for 2 summers now, an older lady had lived there and she had since passed away. The word around the neighborhood was her son sold the house in the winter. My Mom was so excited about having new neighbors. I know she hoped that I would make friends here, or anywhere for that matter. I heard car doors slam and before I could look up, I was encompassed in a huge shadow. "I'm Emmett," the shadow said as he stuck his hand out to shake mine. I didn't reach for his hand so he gently grabbed my hand putting in his and shook it for me. I smiled, and quietly said, "I'm Isabella" Before my words were completely out of my mouth he was hugging me. His Mother was calling after him to go easy on me. His Brother was gathering all of his stuff from the car and heading inside. And his parents came over to introduce themselves to my Mom. The McCarty's had arrived. I don't think the Shore will be the same. As I stood there my mind kept repeating a quote from my favorite poem "Long I stood there wondering, fearing ". There goes my peaceful summer.


	2. Chapter 2

Our parents were thick as thieves from the moment their car door opened. As soon as the McCarty's settled in, our parents began hosting alternating dinner nights drinking wine in the yard and talking like long lost friends. Emmett's older brother Riley hated the shore. He stayed dormant inside, with video games and television. I could relate to hiding out but he was not pleased with the shore the first few weeks his parents pressured him to go everywhere with us. Equal to the level of hate Riley had for the shore is Emmett's love of all things LBI. My Mom and I acted as the best tour guides that we could.

So first lesson on the shore was the beach, we got up early, swim suit ready as we pack some chairs, towels and the beach tags. We loaded up the car and we were off to cross the bridge to the island. Emmett's eyes were wide as we pass the huge Surf shop. We parked and began to divvy up the stuff.

Walking to the top of the dunes our shoes came off, and the smell of the salt air along with the breeze from the water relaxed me instantly. I hear a chuckle in front of me I open my eyes to see him smiling at me. My senses have been on high alert since the handshake. He may just be everything I'm not which draws me to him with every breath. He talks constantly telling me stories asking me questions; his need for attention is relentless. I am mostly quiet but I do answer all of his questions. I never had a best friend before. I'm sure this is what it feels like. We both run down towards the water dropping our stuff on the way, neither one of us could wait to touch the water. It was his first time in the ocean. I don't think he is prepared for how cold the first touch always is. It was my chance to teach him Something I know, I hope he loves the waves as much as I do; the idea of swimming with someone who is not my Mom is exciting. We spent the day talking and jumping hardly bothering to come out of the surf. He asked me why I didn't hang out with the kids in the neighborhood. He was approached by a few boys that were wanting his friendship. I learned that he had turned them down because of the way they talked about me. He is already my friend I am sure. By early afternoon we were all sun kissed and exhausted. Riley had sat most of the day under an umbrella wrapped in a towel pouting as usual. While the rest of us smiled and laughed all day. We just went about our beach day fun moving around Riley with out any extra attention. We had everything packed up and we started our trek back.

Back at the house the cool pelting spray of our outdoor shower is a welcome feeling after the hours of surf and sun. There were sandwiches all around, Slurpees quenching the thirst brought on by the gallons of salt water we all ingested today. Now we sat cool and clean eating quietly at the picnic table. Riley wasn't joining us at lunch, shocking. Our Mom's talked endlessly of shopping and recipes and LBI's hidden treasures. Emmett just stared at me as I ate smiling. I knew it was coming, he was about to go into integration mode and here we go. "So little Bell, not much for talking I see? Well that is fine I talk enough for two" I mumble no kidding. He chuckles and continues to eat.

Later in the week I was sitting on the dock after dinner. It is my happy place. I felt the dock moving under his feet. I looked up to Emmett, with a serious expression. "What's going on Emmett is something wrong" He looked like he carried the weight of the world on his shoulder, as much as an almost seventh grader could anyway. He sat down next to me and let out a huge sigh. "Ok little Bell, here is how I see it, I've only been here a few weeks," I roll my eyes. "I've never had a best friend but I think you are it." I turn my whole body towards him and I know I'm making a bad face I can feel it but I'm not stopping it from happening."stop right there with the face, I know you don't have a lot of friends and that I am new here but we just seem to fit, so go with it ok." Now I am looking down while I answer him back. "It's just who I am, quiet, I don't have friends. But I think you are right we do fit." That was it, what I'd felt since the handshake. He felt it too. Finally I had a friend.

The next morning at breakfast was the first time my Mom brought up the subject of me having a friend. She was beside herself with joy. Considering I had a friend for the first time in my almost eleven year old life, she informed me that my Dad was happy just not that he was a boy who was a year older. None of that mattered to me.

The weeks flew by Emmett and I hung out from sun up to sun down everyday. My Dad had to come and go for work; Mrs. McCarty worked from home in publishing. Mr. McCarty only went back to their house twice this month. I am not sure why, but the mood at their house was different and no one was saying why. Before I realized it, August was upon us and my Birthday was around the corner. Emmett wanted us to have a big day. Doing only the stuff I loved to do, after all it was my day. Truthfully anything we did together would be perfect I never knew how great having a best friend would be. But with excitement of my Birthday came the realization that the summer was nearly over and what would become of our new friendship?


	3. Chapter 3

August of our first summer of the Swan/McCarty, or Bella and Emmett, rolled around and ended as quickly as it began. My birthday was around the corner which meant our final two weeks here. Em was not upset at all. He would just pat my head and tell things will work out. So the days flew by, I had decided that I wanted to have a family beach day followed with a BBQ. So the two families packed up the stuff for the day and headed to the ocean. I loved having my two favorite guys there. My dad loved jumping waves as much as we did. Finally worn out he went to dry off on shore. I went under a breaking wave when I stood up I noticed Em's stare. He looked so serious, he proceeded to tell me he expected me to try to make friends at school. I can't even picture that but I nodded. I told him I didn't want him to forget me. He gave me a small controlled smile and grabbed my hand under water. He held it for just a second but here I was in the place where I felt so free and feeling him touch my hand was magical. He quickly let go as the next batch of waves came barreling toward us. That elated feeling and goofy grin I wore the rest of the day. After we packed up the stuff, it was off to the house to clean up for the BBQ.

While I was getting ready, my Dad started the music and by the time I was in the yard my parents were dancing to Bell Bottom Blues. Em was on the dock watching the water so I headed out. When I sat down carefully next to him he handed me a journal purple and pink and peace signs all over it. I smiled as soon as I laid eyes on it.

"This is for you and I want you to write everything that happens to you this year, good and bad, boring and exciting. I will do the same, and if we want to we can switch next summer and read how everything went without missing anything." He pulled out a plain blue journal he will write too. I was so excited.

"I love this, now I can pretend I am talking to you even when we are apart. When will your family come back down? Maybe I can get my parents to come down too, sometimes we come in the winter just to get away and check on the house."

"Bella, we are staying down here for good. My Dad was laid off and my Mom can work from anywhere and we love it here, well except Riley. So my Dad is handy and has talked to some of the neighbors and I think he will do some repairs for people while they are gone and look after their houses."

"Oh Emmett, I'm sorry about your Dad's job, so you have to switch schools too. It's different here; the people who live here all the time don't like the summer people too much. What about Riley, he already hates it, what did he say?"

"Riley and I will be fine; he is just a teenager, that's what my Mom always tells us. My Dad's excited, I think he is looking forward to working with his hands and working on our house too. So anytime you want to come down with your parents I will be right here."

I 'm not sure how he was really feeling but I was a little relieved that all the quiet talking over the last few weeks was about work and not something else. So the McCarty's will sell their other home and move everything down here. I think I could get my Mom to come and visit here and there, so maybe things were looking up. Now on to my birthday BBQ portion of this day.

Riley even joined us this time; I may have seen a hint of a smile. We were singing and laughing, eating telling stories of summers past. All in all a great day was had by all. My Dad lit the torches as the sky grew dark, and out came the cake. Everyone sang to me and I blew out my candles making my wish. Now if it could only come true. Please let my first friend, the very best friend I could have ever have wished for be alright and happy to see me next year.

The last week was us mostly packing up and the McCarty's moving things little by little. Emmett had to go to sign up for school the morning we were leaving, so he was out front waiting to say goodbye. His Mom was moving slow this morning, I have never been happier about anything. He hugged me and patted my head, and leaned down and said very quietly, "noting will change about us being friends; you can count on that little Bell."

I couldn't really say anything I didn't want him to see me cry, so I just gave him a weak smile and nodded. I climbed in the car and my pulled away I watched him in the mirror until I couldn't see him anymore. Then I cried all the way to the second toll. I hope this is the fastest year of my life.


	4. Chapter 4

First day of school of my sixth grade it's Junior High and there will be so many changes. I'm dressed, fed, bag packed, sitting on the couch staring blankly out the front window. Mom is singing and floating around the house getting ready to get us out the door. She lives for the beginning of things. Here I am, Emmett's friendship has changed me, I'm different, better. Now I want more for myself. Junior High means I switch classes, we are the youngest in the school again, sports thrown into the mix, really what is the same? Just the jerky kids I have always had in my class. Add in the kids from two other elementary schools is a hot mess. I want to have something to report to Emmett via my journal tonight, I want him proud of me, of the effect he has had on me. Now I am thinking about him starting seventh grade in a new school, it will be rough for him the shore kids are not fond of the summer kids. I hear Mom opening the garage door that is my cue, summer is over let the year begin so it can end and bring me back to Emmett.

The first few weeks were full of forms and introductions. New schedule to learn, locker to manage, gym (changing for it turns out to be a hassle), so much at once it seems like too much but I handle it better than usual. I write it all down my feelings my interactions, I picture I am talking to him as I write it so I'm not so lonely. My parents are watching me closely, my Mom is hoping for a miracle and that I will make friends finally. My Dad is watching me too only his view isn't so clear. He doesn't seem to mind if I make friends or not he just keeps asking me things about Emmett. He wants to know what I am writing in my journal, why I seem melancholy. Dad doesn't think I am myself, he was fine with the way I was before. Quiet, solitary, hiding in the house listening to music, thinking more than acting that described my Dad and me until now. My Mom on the other hand acts before she thinks on a regular basis. So Friday I came home from school smiling, eating dinner all together, still I am smiling. Finally Mom can't stand it anymore. She demands to know what has changed. I am happy to report I made a friend at school. Mary Alice Brandon, she came from a school across town, dropped into Junior High just like I was. She is fierce. Outspoken, and pushy but she is smart and loves music as much as I do. Her best friend from last year moved and she started the year alone. I tell my parents about her, working parents, she is an only child too, and her Dad travels a lot. She prefers we call her Alice; no demands would be a better way of explaining it. We have a few classes together, eat lunch together, I have never had a friend at school.

When I am alone at night writing in my journal it feels like I am betraying my best friend. How is he; has he forgotten me, is football all he thought it would be. I have so many questions. Writing them in my journal, I expect him to answer all of them. My two friends are alike in a couple of ways, both are outgoing, there are no shortages of their opinions, and they don't let me get away with hiding. I used to just blend into the crowd at school, now Alice likes to be seen. So here I am totally out of my comfort zone, it feels right somehow. I think Emmett would be impressed, I really don't recognize myself anymore, that's a good thing I think. When I say that I mean it too, Alice and my Mom are fast friends as well and they are changing my style from my toes to my hair.

The school year is about to come to a close, the Holidays breezed through, cards passed in the mail between the McCarty's and the Swan's. My Dad has talked to Mr. McCarty a few times checking on the house. Emmett always says hi, that is the message I get anyway. My journal is full, I have taken care to write almost everyday. Alice has asked me about my journal a couple of times, she thinks she understands Emmett and I. She visits her Grandma every year and made a friend there that she writes to once in a while. I just smile and agree with her, but what Emmett and I have is special. He gets me, doesn't change me, always encourages me and most importantly lets me be. At least he did last year, what will happen in two weeks when I am back at the shore, will he be the same? I know I feel the same about him. I can't wait to see how he did this year, and let him see how I did. I hope he likes the changes. I am starting to.

So here we are the last day of school. I have been packed since the weekend; I don't want to waste any time. Mom understands she is ready too. One more sleep and I will be back to my happy place, and Emmett. Alice is edgy, she knows I am leaving, I tell her to visit, I hope she does. We have email accounts for school, so we promise to email often.

Now I am lying in bed, sleep is not an option. I am playing out all the possibilities in my head. The anticipation is killing me; I can't help but wonder what he is thinking. I am up and dressed early and my Mom senses the urgency in our departure. Soon as Dad is off to work we are in the car, music cued up and we are on our way, to the shore we go.


	5. Chapter 5

Here I am staring out my window looking into hers wishing it was two weeks ago and that she would walk by and wave at me. But I am dressed for my first day of seventh grade and my new school. I would have already started football if we hadn't moved permanently to the shore. I can hear my Dad arguing with Riley through the hall. I am dreading today and I have never felt this way about school before. I am likable, outgoing, and friendly. I have never had a problem meeting people or putting myself out there. But for some reason today seems like my social death. Riley is used to social death, Mister grumpy all in black "I Hate Everyone". This should be old hat for him. He didn't really like our old school either, but the kids in our neighborhood loved him, looked up to him. Now here we are starting at zero the unknown.

We actually had to get dropped off and picked up everyday because the buses don't run as far down as the houses on the water. Bella wasn't kidding when she said the kids and the teachers would treat us different. For a girl who didn't talk much she sure knew a lot about what went on here. Classes were fine, school wasn't hard for me. Dad was meeting me after school so I could do a late sign up for football. I would be playing for the school this year not a club team so I had no idea how things would work. The ladies in the office wouldn't help me when we signed up for school last week; they told me that they weren't sure if they would let me sign up late. Here we sat outside the locker room waiting for coach to come out so we could talk to him. The good news for me was I grew early, so compared to the rest of the kids I look like the Hulk. So needless to say signing up wasn't a problem. I also played since I was six. Some days after taking the hits I took I missed the flag football days at the Y.

Dinner was quiet, I had a craptastic day but at least starting tomorrow I had football to concentrate on. Riley oddly loved school; he was smiling all through dinner. It was the weirdest thing. Even my Mom was looking at him with a stink eye. He sad the kids were fine "just as messed up as me" he said. Good for him, I was finished loading the dish washer and half way up the stairs when I heard my parents talking about money, or lack of it anyway. I finished my climb slower than I started. I retreated to my journal; first putting on some mood fitting music, melancholy so that would be Dave Mathews Band. My thoughts about today flowed easily out into my journal, I felt like I could turn all my troubles over to Bella this way. I couldn't help but wonder how she was, what kind of day she was having. I thought about the fact that she spent her whole life quiet and not thrilled with school. How did she make it this far without anyone realizing how fantastic and brilliant she was. She didn't say much but it was always spot on and quite like a zinger of truth in every situation. I on the other hand said too much and meant very little. She was the exception for me in everything. I meant everything I said to her. She was only gone about a week, and I already felt emptier.

Days fell into weeks Riley wasn't as happy as the first day but he held his own. I focused on football; it numbed the rest for me. Soon the season was over, we did pretty well, and I did my best so I was fine with the rest. Winter was approaching. Holidays came and went my only contact with Bella was my journal, and the holiday card from the Swan's. I secretly hoped that she would randomly visit. Each weekend I would listen for the tell tale sound of the Swan family car or the garage door opener. Even in the windy cold days I spent a least a little time each day on the dock just the way Bella and I had last summer.

The days seemed long and quiet; I did talk some to the other guys from the football team. No life long bonding there just guys in sports. I wasn't the only new person there was a girl from up North too. I think I heard her tell me the town, not that I can remember but I think it is near Bella. She is kind of pushy, but we have lunch together a lot. Rosalie Hale, she is pretty and she is as lonely as I am. She had to leave her best friend. So I can relate I guess. After all mine had to leave me. I am counting the days until June now. When I came in from the dock today I heard Dad on the phone with Mr. Swan, I rushed in just as he was hanging up. The look on my face must have been telling, because he said Bella says "Hi". That's it, is that all she says? Did she really say it or are our Dad's just saying that, this year can not go fast enough. I was cleaning up after dinner and my Mom, hip checks me and gives me a look. "I'm sure she misses you too, it won't be long". I hope both are true. I am praying that she comes down for the summer. Wait is there a chance she won't. Oh another whole scenario to worry about, great.

The last day of school is today. I know it is the same for her, now just to wait will she come down tonight or in the morning or will I have to wait for the weekend? This is too much to think about. I have filled my journal, I hope she has too. I can't wait to see what she has been up to. How she looks, who am I kidding, I just want her here with me for the two and half months the rest will fall into place.

I didn't sleep at all; I am up dressed and sitting on the front steps. At about 8:30 AM, my Dad calls over to me and we go in the Swan house and open up the windows and air it out a bit. I am in her room, it feels so weird still so empty. I am back on the steps by 9. I don't care how long I will sit here, I am not moving until she is here. I see lots of cars pulling in all over the neighborhood. Lots of families are back down for the summer. Not the one I care about though. Its 10:05 and I hear faint sounds of the Grateful Dead. I know it in an instant it's her. I stand, huge smile on my face, my heart is pounding as soon as I see her smile is the same as mine. Finally!


	6. Chapter 6

The shore exits are approaching; I am watching the mile markers now. Finally Seaside exits, we are almost there. My Mom is making small talk about the Jersey shore kids, and reality TV. I am just nodding my head. The good news about my Mom is when she is talking she really doesn't need anyone to answer; she just carries on the conversation. Exit 63, there it is our exit, this has been the longest two hours of my life. I know dramatic right, blame Alice. She has made the build up of seeing Emmett so much more intense. Her incessant questions about a budding romance or a crush are making me think of things differently. Living 11 years without a real friend and then meeting my best friend and it changing my life in two and a half months. Romance was not what I was thinking about at all. I am 11. This friendship just feels like so much more, like I have waited, saving all my friend energy for him. I just hope when I get there he has at least thought of me. It will really ruin my summer if he is not even happy to see me. I am starting to think my Mom is driving slowly to get a rise out of me. We catch every light. This is torture. She is now discussing the store changes at each light, I don't really care if the Path mark is closed and that she hopes the B&B department store is still open. We turn down our street. I have the window down and I can smell the distinct fishy/salty smell. This last half a mile is moving so slow it is all but in reverse. Casey Jones is playing on the radio; this song always makes me sing along although today is the exception. I see him standing in the front yard, that smile I think it matches mine, my heart is racing. My Mom is pulling in and tells me "go on go get your friend". She doesn't have to tell me twice, I'm not sure the car is even stopped fully but I am out the door.

Emmett is lifting me up and twirling me around. No words are spoken. He is so much bigger than I remember. I can hear our Moms greeting each other. The sounds of the shore seem so loud, the seagulls and the water lapping on the bulkhead. Before this year the first thing I did after we parked was run for the dock to feel the sun and hear the water. It has always been my favorite place to think and to just feel whole. He puts me down and is still smiling at me when I say "dock", and we are off. Thru the gate and over the sandy rock yard dropping our shoes at the edge of the dock. This is it truly my happy place and Emmett is with me, it doesn't get better than this.

We sat there on the dock for at least an hour. Nothing had changes and everything had changed. I was frantically asking him about his year and school and football and Riley, as he sat quietly smiling at me patiently waiting for me to take a breath. "What a difference a year makes Little Swan." He was right last year our roles were reversed and I was quietly watching him and he was firing questions at me. At the same time we both say "did you write in your journal"? We both smile and answer yes. We agree to exchange them later, and read them in private then we will discuss them. My Mom calls me to unload the car. Emmett helps me up off the rough wood of the dock. He offers to help; he said he wasn't ready to let me out of his sight yet. Surely my color is pinker than usual. Many trips in the house and out to the car later, Mrs. McCarty made us all lunch. Riley is not only joining us but is talking to me about school and wanting to take drum lessons. It may just be the most he has ever spoken to me or even in front of me. Emmett still hasn't mentioned anything about school or his year. I guess I will find out when I read his journal. I am a little nervous about just handing mine over without being there to explain.

After lunch Emmett and Riley take me out in their new boat. It's a tiny Boston Whaler. We go for a ride in the lagoons. Today is the best day I have had in forever; it's so much fun looking at the houses from the water. We can see all the people who are moving in for the summer. On the trip back Emmett tells me that he has to help his Dad tonight open up some houses. Mr. McCarty has watched the houses over the winter and doing repairs and updates, now they have to open everything up before the owners come down. The disappointment is clear on my face, he assures me as we are docking the boat that when he gets back we can exchange journals and start catching up. Now it's 8PM and my Dad has called to check on us and we went grocery shopping. Most of the unpacking is done. I am sitting in the yard with the fire pit going, my ipod is playing Radiohead really low, journal on my lap. I hear the clinking of the gate closing and look up to see a really tired Emmett holding his journal. I suggest we just exchange and get some sleep. I am always extra tired the first few days at the shore from the damp air. Well that is the reason my Mom always gives me anyway. So we switch books and he walks me the door. No words are exchanged just a comfortable look of acceptance we both sighed noticeably and went to our houses for the night.


	7. Chapter 7

**Ok my first authors note, first I don't own Twilight, and thank you Ms. Meyer for making me a freak who can't stop reading. Also thank you to everyone who is reading. To see how many people are reading my story is an amazing feeling. Only a few of you are telling me how it makes them feel but I can live with that. It's not like I review every story or every chapter I read either. But feel free to leave me a note when your done, it does really inspire me to write more and faster. Enjoy! **

My first full day of the shore, I woke up with the sun. Now at the shore that is easily at five, if you live on the water the sun is up you are up. I was standing in the middle of my room looking around. Each summer I find myself wishing my room was different when I got here. My Mom had decorated it when I was small and it wasn't fairies and flowers or anything but I was into rock music than pale yellow and sea shells, out of the corner of my eye I could see Emmett's window. I went over to the window to see if he was awake too. As I knelt Emmett was just sitting up in bed. We both opened the windows at the same time. He gave me a half smile, and confessed he didn't read my journal yet. I only read the first page was my reply. I could hear my Mom downstairs, and smell the coffee; my Dad would be here pretty early today. Emmett told me he would be down in a half an hour; I told him I would meet him out back. I dressed and ran down stairs. Mom was making muffins and humming along to Billy Joel. She smiled at me as I took two muffins out of the basket. I mumbled a goodbye as the screen door slammed behind me. I met Emmett on his dock handing over the other muffin I stole from my Mom. "Thanks little Swan", he said with a huge smile, the one I loved with all the dimples. I blushed a bit and nodded. So we sat, and talked and laughed just like last year. I was relieved that things had not changed.

We had decided to read the journals together so that we could ask each other questions. It seemed like a good idea really, however the first three times we tried people would interrupt us. First was my Dad, we decided to sit in the back yard and listen to music while we read. So we grabbed the journals and Emmett brought out some waters, I set up the umbrella and we took our seats. By about the third page my Dad had arrived. He was loud and happy to be on vacation and it was impossible to continue. I think a part of me was relieved, I had already read enough to see that where I had a great year, and Emmett had not. So attempt number two was the next day after church, we went up on the deck while our Dad's were fishing, our Moms were at the flea market and we thought it would be perfect. We got set up and comfy and all of a sudden there was this horrible banging from Emmett's garage. I think my facial expression was worth 1000 words at that point. Emmett began laughing hysterically. " By the way Riley took up the drums this year, sounds great doesn't he?" I scrunched up my face and nodded yes, but really meant no way. We both got up and ran down to the garage to give him a hard time. The third attempt was that night, each of us in our rooms with the windows down, we were suppose to read a bit and then discuss across the alley. However the neighborhood kids were out late that night so they were hanging out around the dead-end street across from our houses. No way either of us wanted to discuss our personal thoughts on our year with the neighborhood listening. So that brings us to today, my Mom is in her art studio (the back porch), Mrs. McCarty is working on her latest editing project, my Dad is back home and at work, Riley and Mr. McCarty are off picking up supplies and doing some work on houses around the neighborhood. So this rainy day it's just Emmett and I in the family room each on an end of the couch reading away.

We were done by dinner, neither one of us said much while we read. I know what I was feeling but had no idea what Emmett was. We each ate with our own families, then met up again on the deck to listen to the water. "So little Swan, who goes first?"

"I will, so not a good year huh, football seemed good, Riley seems good, your parents fighting a bit, not a good transition to the new school over all?"

"It's fine not what I was expecting, but your right football was good, Riley seems happy as I have ever seen him and the drums, funny right, my parents are another story, things are just hard right now."

"I'm sorry, I thought about you so much, I am sure you could tell from reading, and I am glad you thought of me too. And Rose, she seems like she is nice to you, and you said she was pretty." I was really dreading this part I didn't want to sound mad about it, I had a friend I want him to have friends right. I hope he didn't hear the unease in my voice.

"Yeah she is pretty, and nice, and full of herself. But it was nice to have someone to eat lunch with. So you have Alice, she sounds like she is fun to be with, and you going to her house and her at yours that is a big change from last year."

"You could say that again, since I met you Emmett McCarty my life has changed."

That was the existent of the discussion on the journals. A few mentions here or there on things we wrote but over all we didn't talk about them again.

The summer was going by quickly, we did all the usual things. Going out in the boat, to the beach the lighthouse, miniature golf. Riley actually went with us places for a change. It was nice the McCarty brothers and I had a pretty great summer. By late July Emmett was already starting to run for football so I would ride my bike as he ran. It was fun, and we were almost never apart, I think we were together more this year than last year. Emmet was trying to figure out a way for us to keep in touch better this year. Neither of us would make it thru on the promise of journals again. He and Riley shared a computer and he had an email address that was his idea anyway. My Mom and Dad had a computer in the office but I never really used it. So I wasn't sure that idea would work, but my suggestion of writing letters made him make the same face I made when I first heard Riley practicing. He assured me we would figure something out.

August brought my birthday, this year I wanted to go to Fantasy Island and Bay Village. So we all loaded up the car and off we went. First we shopped around in Bay Village, Emmett and I shared my favorite giant homemade waffle and ice cream piled high with whip cream and strawberries. It was so delicious, but maybe we should have eaten it after we went on the rides. The second trip around in the Ferris wheel and I was seriously rethinking my desert choice. The boys all tried winning me presents by playing the boardwalk games. They were so funny to watch them competing with each other. All in all it was a fun night. When we got home I opened my gifts to find that my parents had bought me a laptop of my own. I was so excited I don't know when I had been happier. The next day Emmett helped me set up an email account and we practiced sending emails back and forth. The last two weeks always fly by but with Emmett having football practice everyday now it was worse by the time he got home he was so tired that we hardly saw each other. A few times Mrs. McCarty and I went up to watch him practice; I had never seen him so intense before. He was happy-go-lucky most of the time with me, and to see him so focused and smashing into people was something else altogether. There were only a few parents watching and a blond girl who never sat in the bleachers she just stood by the fence. I wish I could see one of his games; maybe my Mom would bring me down this fall. So here we were on our last night at the shore and I was already sad. I was sitting on the dock when Emmett was done with his post practice shower. He came out carrying his dinner with him. "Do you mind if I eat out here with you?"

"Not at all, have a seat. I am happy I am going to see Alice this week, but thinking about leaving you again makes me feel awful. You are really are my best friend Emmett. I am even going to miss Riley this year."

"Oh little Swan, you are my best friend too, don't worry we will email everyday it won't be so bad I promise, and at least you have Alice to keep you company and just think by the time you come back Riley's drumming may not suck as much."

We both laughed and just stayed out there until our Moms called us to come in. The next day I said goodbye to him as he left for practice knowing that I would be gone by the time he got home. Riley helped us load our stuff in the car and our Moms hugged each other. Riley hugged me and said "listen Bella, he really will miss you and I think this year I will too, I hope you really email him he is really lonely down here in the winter," I was doing alright until he told me how lonely Emmett was, it broke my heart. I knew I would cry but I didn't even make it to the car door before I started. I turned back to Riley and promised I would email them both, and got in the car and we started our journey back to reality. Another summer down, and what would this school year bring.


	8. Chapter 8

TO: LITTLESWAN

FROM: MCEMMETT

I hate that I wasn't there when you left today. Riley said he helped pack your car, and that you got off alright. Practice was hard; I had to run extra for not paying attention. Mom picked me up and I had lunch and I was sitting on the dock and I guess I fell asleep. I woke up with sunburn that will be fun in my football equipment. How was your day? Did you get settled in at home, did Alice call you yet? At least you have the weekend before you start back up. Mom bought Riley and I our school supplies, I hate getting this stuff. So this summer flew by, this sending an email is harder than I thought, but it's the first day, so not much has happened. I hope you are ok and having fun with Alice. I can't wait to meet her. I will send you my game schedule maybe you can come down and see me play. I hope you email is as random as mine. Email me back.

Em

TO:MCEMMETT

FROM:LITTLESWAN

Hi Emmett

I am sorry to hear that you had to run extra it was a really hot day today too. I hope you drank a lot of water. And sunburn too what the heck were you sleeping on the dock? I am ok, still bummed it usually takes me a day or so to adjust to being home. Alice is still away until late tonight but she already left a message here and she wants to go school shopping with my Mom and me. I can only imagine what she and my Mom will force me to wear. I love shopping for supplies, how do you not like it, all the markers and notebooks and gadgets, and I don't know why I always have. I would like to come and see you play; maybe Alice will come with me. My Mom's schedule is full every weekend this fall with art classes; I hope my Dad will take us down. I will let Alice ask him she gets everyone to do what she wants. She went to see her Grandma this summer for a few weeks anyway. I thought the summer went by really fast too, it was nice to have Riley with us more, and I loved going out in the boat. I hope school goes better for you. I think it should I can't understand why the kids there don't see how great you are. Maybe being in football for two years now the kids might be better to you. Eighth grade for you almost a high schooler. Maybe you won't even be able to talk to me next year I mean you will be up a whole level. I better soak up all the Emmett I can get before you are a high school football star. I will email again soon tell Riley I said hello.

Bella

TO: LITTLESWAN

FROM: MCEMMETT

I meant to ask you how you liked my email address. I worked hard on it: NOT. Things are fine, Riley says hello. He is driving me crazy with the drumming. Please let him get better fast. How was shopping, I like your new look from this summer, I liked your old look too. I thought you looked really pretty this summer. I did notice. So remember I told you about that Rosalie girl who eats lunch with me, well she is showing up to practices a lot, I guess she likes one of the guys, why else would a girl want to stand out in the sun to watch some sweaty boys run around. What ever, so school starts tomorrow I am not thrilled. Classes should be fine, football is fine but I just wish you were here to hang out with. I miss you in the winter. I attached my schedule so find a game and come see me play, let me know which one. Good Luck tomorrow Little Swan.

Em

TO:MCEMMETT

FROM:LITTLESWAN

I do like your email, I already know you like mine since you thought it up. Shopping was fine, thank you for saying you thought I look pretty, the new look, if that is what you want to call it. I just never really put much thought into it, I guess I dressed more like my dad concert t's and jeans, comfy shoes. Alice is pushing me to dress more like her, since you have never seen her I guess really girly would be a good way to describe her. I am actually not nervous at all but I have Alice, so that makes things easier. Rosalie, I do remember you mentioning her. Who do you think she likes on the team? Well I better go pack my bag for school. My dad is out of town today but I will talk to him at dinner tomorrow about the dates for the games. Good luck Emmett you will do great I am sure.

Bella


	9. Chapter 9

_So I took really long this time, but I have the later chapters stuck in my head which is making it harder to write the current chapters fast. I hope you like it please stick with it, I promise it gets better. Let me know what you think, I would love to hear from you. I have a twitter account blackbird73, and facebook too blackbird_seventythree. Let me know if you have trouble finding me. I am just starting out so I am hoping to get my fantastic readers to reach out one way or another. SM owns the names but not the bad grammar and weird locations, that is all me. _

To: MCEMMETT

From:LITTLESWAN

Em, that was a fun weekend, I haven't been to the shore in the fall in a while. Chowder Fest was a first for me, I think Alice wanted to puke but she still had a good time. Watching you play was so exciting; it was my first game, knowing it was you playing made it more intense. So you met Alice, what do you think? She loved you and Riley, I am glad he was hanging out with us. Being Alice's first time at the shore and meeting you was tough on me, I wanted her to like everything. My worlds collided for the first time. Well it was the first time I had more than one world. I thought Rosalie was nice, and funny that she knows Alice. I never dreamed she was her friend who moved away. It was like we traded friends, do you think we should have invited her to the Chowder Fest. I thought we might see her there. Riley still seems so happy, it is such a big change, and your parents must be relieved. Alice thought you were a lot of fun, and she loved the water and really wants to visit next summer. I don't know if that is such a good idea. I was glad to hear that school is going a bit better for you. The emails we write are so random, this is the worst one I wrote yet, I am just still so keyed up from the weekend. I like hearing from you and telling you what is going on with me but it feels so monotone for us. So I was thinking that we should trade songs or groups in each email, so we know what the other person is listening to. It will help me know how you are feeling or at least be able to put some sound to our conversations. Write soon. I am glad I didn't have to wait the whole school year to see you.

B

To:LITTLESWAN

From:MCEMMETT

B, I finally met A. That was funnier in my head I promise. Alice, what can you say, she is a force to be reckoned with. I hope I never get on her bad side, I see what you mean about getting what she wants. The game, I am glad we won; having you there was great. I hope you liked it; football is a big part of who I am. The coach thinks if I keep working hard it might help me go to any college I want. College, I can hardly think about High School. And if I didn't cover it before when you asked if I still would have time for you next summer, YES. Is the answer. Just because I am starting high school doesn't change anything between us. Besides you are way more mature than me already. Alice being friends with Rosalie was weird for sure. I do still eat lunch with her. We have a couple of classes together too. She is all right, the guys all think that she is hot and they probably think we are dating but I like things the way they are. Chowder fest was great, better with you guys there. Riley and I went last year with my parents and it was lame. Alice did look a little green on the way home. And as for inviting Rose, I'm sure she was there, she was more than a little surprised to see Alice and meet you. And as far as what I thought about if we should have asked her to go with us, all I can say is I don't think about her. Riley had fun he likes Alice too, it was nicer as four rather than three. My parents are very happy he is happy. I hope you can come down again soon, and the emailing is better than the waiting for the journal. I do know that I will have to go to football camp next summer and have two a days all of August. So if Alice does come down it might be nicer for you, I will be a bit busier. Riley can still take you ladies out on the boat and bait your hooks when you fish if I'm not there. So a song huh I think that is a good idea, I know how you equate everything with music. Lets see I have listened to lots of old R&B with my Mom lately so I guess Otis Redding is what I am listening too a lot of, Sitting on the Dock of the Bay, (get it) or Try a Little Tenderness. That is where my head is at until I get in the locker room and the speed metal is blasting, no reference to that needed I don't mind that our emails are random, I hope you don't I always smile when I see I have mail. Study hard B, the holidays are coming fast, maybe we can talk your parents into spending them at the shore.

Em

To:MCEMMET

From:LITTLESWAN

Em, I have added Otis to my play list. I do love Otis. This email will be short I am in a hurry; Alice has us trying new after school stuff. Don't ask I hate it all. It cuts into my reading and listening to music time. The 564th difference between A and B, is I love quiet alone time with a book or my I Pod. She needs constant companionship. I am hinting like crazy about the holidays. If I can get my Mom on board my Dad is clay in her hands (get it art joke). It was funnier in my head too. How did you like the A and B reference? I am turning your jokes against you. School is good, my classes are easy, and I am helping my Mom out at work one day a week. I am actually enjoying it. I do prefer this to the journals too. Here is my musical offering, The Police, Message in a bottle, Don't stand so close to me. You know them, but do you like them? I have to go. Work on your Mom, maybe she will work on my Mom too. And your emails=smiles here too.

B

To:LITTLESWAN

From:MCEMMETT

I know this is long over due, I hope you aren't too mad at me. Football was crazy for a while, we did really well but that meant we had to practice more and play more. Then my grades were not awful but not good. So long story short I lost computer rights for a while. And I couldn't get my grades up till after Thanksgiving. So now here we are in December. I hope you are still talking to me, I hope you are coming down for Christmas. B it's all I asked Santa for. The Police excellent, Gordon Sumner, is always a quality choice. I have been really Billy Joel ish lately. I am feeling the lyrics. No song in particular. Just any Billy. I am sorry Alice has you joining stuff but if you don't try how will you ever know what you will like. I can't wait to hear the particulars about this experiment. I have helped Dad too; getting the houses ready for the winter is a lot of work. Riley goes too but he is not much help. Mom said she called your Mom about the holidays; she would love to see her since she saw you and your Dad for the game. We shall see. I hope you are staying busy and doing better in school than I am. Joel listen, love it.

Em


	10. Chapter 10

_**Sorry this took so long, I hope it is worth the wait. Happy Halloween! **_

To:MCEMMETT

From:LITTLESWAN

EM, it's Christmas Eve and it is so quiet here. My Mom and Dad are fighting, who knows why, it's odd they never fight. Alice is at her Grandma's for the weekend. I guess it's another month that I won't be seeing you. So Joel, I have listened to quite a bit. I never noticed how much of a downer he really is. Good lyrics I will give you that. So my selection for you is Simon and Garfunkel, classics, love them learn them. So what's going on for you now that football is over and school is on break what are the McCarty's doing for fun. My Mom's shop is closed down for the school break, my Dad has a week off then he is back to work just before the New Year. School has been fine, Alice is fine, and she is the same as always. I really have nothing going on but I was thinking maybe we could chat so I set up my id as the same as my email and I login when I am home so sign up as soon as you get this. How did we ever get through last year with only a journal, is it just me or do you need some instant gratification. I mean I am logging in to my email all the time waiting for your responses. So Bridge over Troubled Waters, Kodachrome, and Cecelia, listen embrace the fro. And please login so we can chat.

B

I was sitting on my bed in my room lit only with the strings of Christmas lights my Mom and I hung in here. My IPod was playing and I heard the tell-tale ding of a new mail. Hope filled me that it was Emmett, and not junk mail. I knew it wasn't Alice her Grandma's house is a dead zone for technology. Clicking the open button just as fast as my fingers would allow I was rewarded with the smallest email he had ever sent. But as I read it a smile grew on my face.

To:LITTLESWAN

From:MCEMMETT

B, I am signing up now so just read this while you wait. I will be logged in soon. I am also already listening to the S & G. I love the fro. I hope your on, I am dying to talk to you live!

Em

He was logging in to the chat, mine was up it was up all the time since Alice suggested it when she realized how bummed I was that I wasn't hearing from Em as often as I had hoped. Things where different since we went to his game. It was no longer just what I thought about how he felt or the way he acted now Alice was weighing in too. She was sure that there was more of a connection between us. I had a whole conversation with her about how we are just kids and she pointed out all the couples at our school. I hoped it would never be like that. The kids at our school who were considered couples were always holding hands and sneaking kisses at their lockers. But the couples were only couples for a week or two then on to the next person. I felt this connection to Em, and Alice was sure he felt it too. I just know I missed my friend and how comfortable I always felt with him. I heard two small beeps and looked up on the screen and saw the chat request waiting for my reply.

E: Little Swan, where are you?

B: I am here Em, I am so glad you were on-line tonight.

E: After dinner Riley and I always hide out waiting for Santa.

B: I hope that works out for you, how is Riley?

E: His playing is still bad but getting better, he says hello by the way.

B: Tell him I said hello and Merry Christmas.

E; Speaking of what is going on over there at the Swan house?

B: I don't know what they are arguing about just that everything they say is angry.

E: I'm sorry B, my parent's fight about money all the time but that is it.

B: It's fine they are human it just never happened before so it's weirding me out.

E: So lets talk about something else. I am going to tell you something but I don't want you to think I am a weirdo.

B: That ship has sailed. Go ahead tell me anything.

E: Nice, I miss you B. More than last year more than I thought I would.

B: That isn't weird I miss you too. You're my friend.

E: Thanks I wanted to tell you two emails ago but I didn't want to risk you not answering.

B: Oh Em, I would always answer, so what was up with your grades?

E: Uh, well I was distracted with football and helping Dad, and do you remember the girl you met Rose?

E: B are you still there did you lose your Internet connection?

B: Sorry I am still here, yes I do remember Rose, so tell me what happened.

E: Well the guys on the team all thought we were going out because we ate lunch together and had some classes and she came to the games. I guess she told some kids she liked me a lot.

B: Do you like her Emmett.

E: My whole name? I like her I guess, but she wanted me to call her all the time and go to the eighth grade dance with her.

B: So what did you do.

E: Well I called for a while but with practice and calling her, my homework got behind so I got grounded just before the dance.

B: Oh Em, you're a good student don't let that go I bet your Dad was mad.

E: Pissed is a better description, he was giving me the scholarship talk, B I'm in he eighth grade for God's sakes. When I said that he pointed out that I was too young for girls.

B: So you got grounded, then what?

E: I couldn't call anymore so she was pissed too and I missed the dance, so she went with someone else from the team. But I couldn't email you I tried to get Riley to email you for me and at least tell you why I wasn't able to. But he told me to fix my own problems.

B: I was worried but I figured football had you busy. So how are your grades, now?

E: Fine, back to normal, hey have you ever been skating in Rockefeller Plaza?

B: Random but yes my Dad used to take us every year. My Mom loves it.

E: My Dad has been talking about it this year to cheer my Mom up.

B: You will love it, the tree is beautiful, I'm sure she will love it too.

E: Are you thinking what I am thinking?

B: Clearly not I haven't any idea what is going on in your mind right now.

E: Harsh but what if I talk Dad into taking us on the same day you talk your Dad into taking you?

B: Wow that could work, I could tell Dad was trying to get Mom to stop being mad at him. I will work on it and email you the day they want to go.

E: Ok let me know, I have to go B, my Dad saw the light from the computer, Merry Christmas!

B: You too don't get in trouble; I hope we will skate this week!


	11. Chapter 11

_**Short chapter here, sorry. I am a bit distracted this week. So Exit 63 is about my love of the New Jersey shore where I spent my summers growing up. Specifically exit 63 Long Beach Island/ Manahawkin, my Mom lives there still. Well many of you have heard or are living thru Sandy and know that the area has been devastated. My Mom is well and managed only to lose possessions, so we are very lucky the house took a beating and will take some time to repair. My Mom is temporarily relocating until we can get the house to livable shape. My heart goes out to our neighbors and friends who did not fair as well as we did, and to those who have lost loved ones due to this brutal storm. Everybody send some positive energy to the East coast as they rebuild and settle in to a new normal. Thanks for reading and reviewing! I love hearing everything you have to say. **_

To:LITTLESWAN

From: MCEMMETT

B, it is on, I hope you can pull this off but we are going tomorrow, high noon. Be there or be square. Riley is jazzed too he is downloading Simon and Garfunkel as we speak preparing for the ride to NYC. He wants in on who we are listening to. My Mom was almost in tears when Dad told her what he wanted to do. Let me know if you want me to have her call your Mom, I think she would. Oh how was Christmas? We are good nothing big. I am online waiting for your reply, listening to Bridge Over Troubled Waters. Work your magic, bat your eyes pull out all the stops. See you soon…..

Em

To:MCEMMETT  
From: LITTLESWAN

Em, ok we will be there, now that seems like it was easy but it wasn't my Dad was supposed to work, but we are meeting him in the city for lunch and he is going to surprise her with skating. I may have over sold what a great idea it will be. Either way he is in. I didn't mention the McCarty involvement that is what you suggested right, I hope so. I am so excited to see you and Riley. Christmas was fine, really quiet if not for Dad's vinyl playing all day there was hardly a peep. I hope this skating helps them too, not just their selfish daughter wanting to see her best friend. Oh, who am I kidding, seeing you totally worth it. Alice will be so mad she missed this. She would over romanticized it anyway. She reads too much. Ha Ha me saying someone else reads too much. She just projects it into everyday life. Riley wants in on our music selections huh we'll let him pick next, I am curious as to what he is listening to. Em I am rambling, sorry I am off like a dirty shirt (too many bad 80's movies for me) rest up McCarty we are skating at noon. No backing out.

B

_**What I said it was short, I know I am hiding right now, and writing don't worry! Bb73**_


	12. Chapter 12

**Epic fail on replying to you reviews this time and of course updating. I got a bit caught up in the day to day. Holiday prep, is it getting to everyone as much as it is me? Enough about RL on to our favorite kids. So here it goes, the big skating day. **

BPV

This is it, the skating day. I could hardly sleep, I am up dressed, and cleaning up from breakfast. My Mom is watching me like I'm crazy. As far as she knows we are just meeting Dad for lunch in the city which I normally would complain about being more work than it is worth. Mom is showering and getting ready and I am changing again, where is Alice when you need her. Seeing Emmett today seems big, bigger than I thought it would, yes I miss him but I am starting to feel more attached than ever. I am freaking out, I just told Alice it wasn't like that for me but it is, it so is. He seems like he feels the same. Today will be a perfect time to test it out, we are both on neutral ground and just our families so no friends or outside influence. Pop music for today I feel happy and light. Before I know it we are in the car and pulling into the parking garage at my Dad's office. He is waiting for us in the lobby when we go thru the big glass doors.

"Are my girls ready for a surprise?" Dad says, smiling like a Cheshire cat.

Mom looks really confused but smiles and shakes her head yes. When she realizes what we are doing she hugs my Dad and tears up a little. I know that I really wanted this to work out so I could see Emmett, but I am happy that they are happy too. So we are off to rent skates and lace them up but I keep scanning the area for the McCarty's. I haven't spotted them yet but based on the amount of butterflies in my stomach, it is entirely possible for me to take flight at the moment. Looking up for the hundredth time I spot Riley leading his family. My Dad is looking in the same direction and sees them as well. He pokes my Mom and points out the people approaching us.

"What an amazing surprise this is, look honey it's the McCarty clan."

Riley sees me and runs thru the crowd picking me up and spinning me around, he whispers in my ear. "Little Swan don't be mad at Em this wasn't his idea, everything will work out." He puts me down gently and I'm confused what would I blame him for having them here is the best thing that has happened to me in a while. I look past Riley, I see their parents smiling back at us and Emmett walking slower and lagging behind now.

EPV

I am singing No sleep till Brooklyn as I pour the cereal I am about to devour. Riley is laughing at me, pointing out that Brooklyn is not where we are going. Mom is humming as she gathers things for the ride to the city and enough gloves and hats and scarves to warm an army. She is so happy to have a fun family outing, which is great but what I am interested in is far more selfish. Today I tell Bella that even though we are apart for most of the year, I want her to be my Girlfriend. It seems silly to think about it but really she is all I think about and even though Rose, wants to hang out with me and hold hands I feel like I would be hurting Bella by doing that. So today I must find out if she likes me or like likes me, as Riley would say. The smile has not left my face since her email came thru. Riley is glad that we get to see her too, but he knows how I feel about her, he may have helped me understand better. He thinks we are the perfect couple whether we know it or not, his words not mine. So while Dad is out getting gas and washing the car for today's journey I am pacing trying to make sure I have everything I need for the ride. Riley has already loaded up the I Pod. So when Dad blows the horn, we are all filing out the front door as the back door of the car opens and a confused Riley is looking at me like I have two heads. Dad steps out of the drivers side and with a huge grin says, " I know grounding you before the dance was kind of harsh and your Mother is trying to teach me to be as concerned about you social life as I am about your sports and grades so look who I found at the bagel shop."

Throwing up is now a valid option. Rose steps out and gives me her best girly wave. Even though my Dad thinks he was doing me a favor he may have just sunk my battle ship. Riley pats me on the back and just shakes his head.

On our long ride into the city, I pretend to be sleeping a couple of times so I wouldn't have to speak to Rose. She is so excited and is chatting with my parents about school and the city and how she loves to go skating. This is all too much; I don't want B to see this, no doubt that this will hurt her. Between the emails from B and the reaction from the game, it is very clear how much Rose gets under her skin. Hoping it is because of me is not a good line of thinking for this situation; damage control is what I have to focus on. Riley, is still shaking his head as we park and climb out. Pulling Riley aside, I am going to beg him to help me. Not knowing what to do I have to rely on my big brother and his wisdom in this situation? We step to the side and he tells me what he thinks the plan should be.

"I'm doing this for B little brother; don't get this confused, I don't want her to get hurt any more than she has to. I will try to explain to her that it was Dad and not you and then when you can get away from you know who take Little B aside and fix this." He doesn't seem confident and I am about to protest but he pulls me closer and says. "Listen this won't be easy no matter how B feels, seeing Rose, with us will be bad, and I will make sure she is having some fun before you swoop in and tell her what ever you think will help in this situation , Dad sure sold you up the river on this one."

As we get closer, I feel colder than ever between the wind and the hole in the pit of my stomach my perfect day with B took a turn for the worst. I see the Swan's. Bella looks so beautiful, smiling and then Riley runs past me and scoops her up in a hug spinning her and she seems so happy and then he puts her down and her expression turns to confusion and when she spots me at the back of the crowd her smile is only a memory. Rose latched on to my arm buzzing with the excitement I too had this morning but that is all gone now. This is a disaster and not what I had planned out in my head.

**I hope I haven't lost my favorite reviewers on this one. Jessa76, thanks for the push and I hope you liked it. Let me know what you think, good bad and ugly I would love to read them all. All mistakes are mine, you can surely tell I am blowing 20 years of dust off my creative writing. I promise it won't take as long for the next chapter. We need to move things along I want them grown up already I have so much to tell. Until then Read Review and Rec! Bb73 **


	13. Chapter 13

**I hope you guys are excited as I am to have this so much faster than the last one. Enjoy! **

**BPV**

The day seemed like a blur as I looked out the window on the way home from the city. We skated, and Riley was great. I was heart broken to find Rose with EM, Riley swooped in and got me on the ice and holding my hand, he began to tell me what happened with his Dad. I understood, the best I could, I know Mr. McCarty was sweet and always wanted to make his boys happy. I do believe his heart was in the right place. It was fun to have the families together our parents had more fun than the kids for sure. They skated and then we went out to eat before saying our goodbyes. Riley made me promise not to hold this against Emmett, telling me that he had planned a very different day for us. Knowing in my head wasn't helping the hurt I felt in my heart. I am only a seventh grader, things shouldn't be this complicated. The ride home was nothing compared to the sleepless night I had, Alice would be home soon. I know she will know just what to do. It didn't help me to listen to my Dad go on and on about how nice it was to see that Emmett had met a nice girl. Rose was nice wasn't' she? I am sure my hate for her was only because she could easily have time and attention from the one person I longed for. It would take the McCarty's longer to get home than it did us. Once we were home I changed into some warm comfy clothes and headed to my room to listen to music, with my head phones on tight I laid there waiting for sleep to come it never did. Alice was at my door by noon the next day. She knew as soon as she entered my room something was up, now I hope she can help me figure out what to do.

**EPV**

Not only did I have to spend the whole day listening to Rose go on and on about I have no idea what. I had to endure watching my brother charm my girl. He had her smiling though I could tell she was upset with me. The longer I watched her the more I wanted to be the one to skate with her and sit with at dinner. She wouldn't allow me to talk to her alone; she wouldn't let me hug her goodbye. The entire day passed without more than a hi and a bye between us. The ride home was just as bad, finally Rose fell asleep, of course on my shoulder, but at least she was quiet. Then I heard a camera click my Mom had taken pictures of us a couple different times today, I will make sure to delete them, and I don't want any evidence left from this nightmare. We dropped Rose off at her house I waved to her from the car not even walking her to the door. Which my parents were not happy with, I heard about it all the way to our house. Finally Riley spoke up telling them the truth about me liking Bella and not Rose and how disappointed I was that she went with us. My Dad felt so bad, he loved B like his own, and promised to never interfere again. As soon as I got home I logged on the computer waiting for her to be on, hoping at least. After an hour or so, I broke down and emailed her. Falling asleep wasn't easy but I was so exhausted from the worry of how to fix this. Riley went over the whole day with me before going to bed himself. Now I knew everything they talked about and I knew without a shadow of a doubt Bella felt as strongly about me as I do for her.

Now it had been a week school was back in session starting in the morning. I sent at least 30 emails, the first couple were medium in length just trying to reassure her that I hated not being able to talk to her in NY. Then I sent longer ones rambling on about my feelings and how I couldn't wait for summer when I could just walk over to her house and talk to her face to face when ever I wanted. I told her how much I missed her and hoped she would understand, I told her how I was staring at her bedroom window trying to will her to be there. I was getting so worried she wouldn't answer any emails I sent, I kept going telling her how I was listening to Radiohead, because I was feeling blue. The last emails I sent were one liners begging her to log on or email me back. But nothing always nothing, I didn't want to leave my computer hoping that she would log in while I was on so I could try to get her to chat with me. Riley hooked up some speakers to the computer and turned the volume all the way up so I could walk away showing me that it would ding if she logged on. I still wouldn't go far. Now I had to shower before bed I had school in the morning and I was afraid to walk away speakers or not. Riley offered to sit and wait while I was in the bathroom. As I dried off I heard the ding, I was tripping over my own feet running for my room. Riley told me to slow down he had started a chat simply typing B, she answered back quickly, but all she said was STOP and then logged off.

We both stood there a minute, looking at the computer. I quickly typed a reply NEVER. I knew that she would get it the next time she logged in. What was going on, I know I was clear in my emails about how I felt about her and that I missed her. Granted I wanted to tell her in person but that wasn't possible right now.

The next day at school Rose was waiting for me at my locker, I was in no mood to deal with her. I ignored her until after school when I pulled her aside and told her rather bluntly that I was not interested and that I wanted her to leave me alone. She was mad, that doesn't even cover it, she was livid. That didn't matter to me however I just wanted to get home to see if Bella would talk to me. I will find a way to fix this, I will not loose her. Summer can't get here soon enough.

**So what is up with Bella, Riley filled Emmett in on what went on all day but what is Alice's advice to Bella? We shall see. It's January, so they still have a few months until summer break. See you again soon. Thanks for reading and reviewing. **


	14. Chapter 14

EPOV

My mind was racing all the time at first. How can I get her to listen to me, I called their house, a million times the first two weeks, I emailed her so much that finally my Brother stepped in. He politely pointed out that she wasn't responding to the onslaught of email and calls and maybe I needed to chill and just try to be patient. All I could think is he must be crazy, right this is B we are talking about, I know she needs me the way I need her, at least as friends. She always tells me I am her best friend. So why is this happening, I need to figure it out. I fell asleep thinking about all the possibilities of what happened to her between when she left dinner, and now, two months later. Nothing made sense; I was starting to switch from hurt and sad to pissed off.

On a random March evening, my Dad came to me after dinner with a sign up sheet for football camp. It was to start the first day of July and would go for three weeks, and few days after returning I would start two a days for high school football. So that would leave me with June only to figure this out with Bella. That is if I could make it that long with out hearing from her. Still everyday I spent my days avoiding Rose, and my evenings hoping that when I logged in I would have email from B. Day after day night after night, I had the same routine. Riley on the other hand was enjoying high school to the fullest, dating, dances, and of course music. He was driving us all nuts with his practicing but who could argue he was getting better at least.

I know my Dad was feeling a little bad for me, he could see the changes in me after that day in NY. He told me he thought it was silly how attached I was to her but knowing how he felt about Mom, and that they were high school sweet hearts, deep down he knew anything was possible. He encouraged me to put all my extra energy into football, so I did, I ran did work outs on my own, lifted. Before I knew it was June 1st, school was officially out for the summer, I was an actual high school student. Now everyday I just waited for her to come to the shore. I didn't want to go very far from home, not by boat or car or outing of any kind. Waiting for her was like a full time job. Riley felt bad for me but we both knew it was only a matter of time before her family would pull in the drive way and this could all be resolved.

BPOV

I was right Alice knew just what to do. "Let him sweat it out a bit B, it's good for him to think about it for a while. Don't check your mail, just wait." So I listened, she stayed over and we giggled about her trip to her Gram's, ate Christmas cookies, and listened to all kinds of music. I felt good, I knew Riley was right and that Em, was sad too, but maybe if he had to suffer a little it wouldn't hurt. I spent the next few nights at Alice's. Alice's parents didn't let her use the computer except for school, so there is no way for me to get my email from here. It was so different at her house; her parents were out every night, constantly doing stuff moving around. When ever I was there I hardly sat down. My Dad was coming to pick Alice and me up; she would stay with us for New Years while her parents were going to be gone. Dad had a few days off and we were hoping for snow. Well we got it for sure; the first morning of the sleep over, my Mom wanted us all to go out to breakfast. So we bundled up and got in the car, Dad suggested we go to a dinner a little out of the way but one they went to when they were dating. So we headed out, bad roads and all Mom was worried about it, nagging Dad about going back but Dad just pushed on.

It was surreal at the time. We could see an accident up ahead as it was happening across the median from us. Then faster than seemed possible one of the cars was crossing the median and hitting us head on. I woke up and our car was on its side the side Mom and I were on, we had rolled at least I think we did. Alice was knocked out, suspended on her side from her seatbelt, Dad was out too, and his air bag seemed to keep him from too much harm. I defiantly had a few broken bones and I could hardly breathe, but my head hurt the most. I was trying to talk to my Mom, she was awake but in a lot of pain. She was pinned in the front seat, the dash board had collapsed some on her side and her legs were stuck and her window had shattered on to her face. I remember fading in and out and finally waking up in a hospital room.

Two days had passed, My Dad was with me, and filled me in on the details. Alice was fine, banged up and mild concussion, home with her parents. I actually had a bad concussion and bruised ribs and cuts and scrapes the worst of my injuries was a broken leg that was surgically repaired, but with a few pins and some physical therapy I would recover. But Mom was the worst off, she was pinned and the injuries she suffered would leave her in the hospital for some time. They were still not sure if she would walk again. My Dad was heart broken and felt responsible for all of this. He just kept rubbing my hand and telling me he couldn't lose us. Maybe it was all the pain meds I was on or my awful headache but he seemed a little off.

I was out of the hospital after a week, Dad stayed with me most of the time, Mom's orders she didn't want me to be afraid. I was fine, Alice came to visit a couple of times before they let me out, and I was allowed to see my Mom, before I left the hospital. She was different, not herself at all. It was hard to see her in so much pain, I could tell she was trying to be positive but just kept asking me to take care of Dad.

In the next few months, I had gone thru a ton of Physical Therapy, and crutches in the winter for an already clumsy person, well it was a sight. I recovered still with a bit of a limp, but better. Alice's Mom drove me to the rehab center a couple of times a week so I could hang out with my Mom. Her outlook was not very good, she hated where she was and didn't see it changing anytime soon, Dad worked a lot, he sometimes didn't come home. Since no one was home Dad canceled all the non essentials and it was only a matter of time before he would probably sell the house. I was practically living with Alice, Mom couldn't handle all the things that were going on, and she had several surgeries to repair a host of things wrong with her from the accident.

Thankful, that is what I was, for having Alice and her family. My parents were both only children, and Mom was still an inpatient and my Dad was off the reservation at least that is what my Grandpa would have said. He didn't engage in life anymore. He felt like he broke my Mom, he couldn't handle it. In just a few months so much had changed for me. My only constant was school, it had always been easy for me, and so even though the rest of my life was chaos I still had good grades and was keeping up. Now my home life, well that was a different story. Mom was hopefully being released home in the summer some time, but our house wasn't a good fit for what she needed. She would be in a wheel chair for some time and maybe for ever no one really said at least to me, and Dad was staying in the city more than he was coming home now.

I didn't know what was going to happen, it felt like it was happening all around me and I was just watching. I hated it, So many times I wanted to talk to Emmett he made everything better. I even gave Dad my password while I was in the hospital so he could check my email. But I had not heard from him since that day in NY. Why didn't he try to reach me, all I could think was maybe Riley miss understood and he wanted to be with Rose. Besides so much bad was going on here I didn't want to suck him down with me. Under all of that I thought that if I didn't know for sure he had chosen Rose, I could hold on to the hope that he did want to be more than friends. So now no email and no hope of the shore this summer, right now as pathetic as it sounds all I could do is wait since I had no say in what happened next.


	15. Chapter 15

BPOV

June

School was out, Dad was getting ready to pack up the house and put it on the market. He wanted Mom to sell the shore house too, but she wouldn't. That shore house had been in our family for two generations and is one of my Mom's favorite places full of memories. The turmoil between my parents is similar to a dense fog when they are together. Dad can't get over the accident and Mom is just starting to act like herself. I credit that to the physical therapist she has. The woman is a hippie saint I swear, she has my Mom talking about teas and herbs and art, and some how got her to work really hard on being as mobile as possible. So Dad feels that there is no way we can live in the tri level house we have so it is on the market.

He found a two bedroom apartment close to the out-patient therapy facility my Mom will be going to when she finally comes home. So at some point this summer we will be a family again. I miss my parents so much, Alice's parents are so great they took me in and treated me like family but I miss my old life. My room, the sound of music in every room, the books on every flat surface, my Mom's candles burning. This was home, no matter if it was a house or an apartment.

The shore, I probably wouldn't be able to go this summer, Dad didn't love it, and Mom isn't ready for that kind of travel and she will be in a wheel chair for a while so it wouldn't be easy for her to get around in. I also wasn't sure I could face Emmett; Dad had checked my email account for me when I was in the hospital. "None to report" was all he said. I can't believe he just blew me off. Picturing that day skating, seeing him with Rose, it was hard. Obviously he didn't want to continue our friendship at this point. I can't believe Riley would have had the story so wrong, but Alice always says never underestimate male hormones. My Dad knew how sad I was and asked me if I was expecting something, but reassured me that I was so young and getting tied up to a shore friend wasn't worth it in the long run.

As June was coming to a close, Alice's parents invited me to go with her to her Grams. I accepted, I didn't have much going on and Alice always loved going so why not. Her Gram was so sweet cooking for us, always baking cookies. She lived in this really old house and it is full of love and memories. I felt so relaxed and happy there. Alice and I were in the yard on the afternoon of July 4th. Just laughing and goofing around, when we met two boys riding bikes along the road. Jasper was the same age as us and lived near by, and the other boy was his cousin Edward. He was three years older but never treated us like we were younger. We spent the rest of our visit hanging out with them. We went for long walks and explored as much as we could. Alice and I were from the city we lived in a sub division at least so being out in this rural area her was full of new experiences. Jasper was so sweet with Alice; he only had eyes for her from the beginning. She could ramble on and on and he would sit at attention absorbing every word she spoke. Edward was cocky, but he loved music and reading as much as I did. So it was refreshing to talk to someone about things I loved without answering questions about my family. He was only visiting like us and he left the day before we did. I was kind of bummed for the first time in forever I had a great time and wasn't thinking about all the heavy stuff going on with my parents. He knew I was in the process of moving so he asked if he could email me, I stiffened up and by the look on his face he knew that wouldn't be and option. When he hugged me goodbye he handed me a slip of paper with his email address and his cell phone number, he told me to call or text or email as soon as I could. Later that night I was sitting in living room with Gram, Alice was out walking with Jasper; it was their last night together. Gram spoke up and asked why I was so sad, I told her that I missed one of my old friends I had lost touch with. She asked me why we lost touch and I told her we only ever emailed each other and I didn't have access to a computer. She told me to hang in there and said "in my day we wrote letters," Letters why had I not written Em a letter? I excused myself and she met me in my room with a pile of stationary and some stamps. "Here you go sweet girl, get to it." I struggled with what to write but I figured I would send a basic how have you been letter and see what kind of response I would get. I mailed it on the way back to Alice's, I was hopeful, but I knew July would be so busy that I wouldn't have time to sit around and wait.

_**Happy Holidays! I am sorry for the delay, busy busy busy, I am sure you all know how it goes. I have lots more to say, so as long as I can find a quiet corner to write I will soon. Thank you for reading and reviewing, I am trying to get to all the reviews each time, I am not perfect but my best effort is always given. I hope you enjoyed this last chapter, more summer to come up next. Bb73**_


	16. Chapter 16

BPOV

The day we got back to Alice's, my Dad picked me up, smile on his face and music in the car. The hollow feeling that I had for the last few months seemed to be filling in, maybe this would be a turning point for us. We were going to move in as much as we could from storage before the movers took over. Mom would be home in a week and that was all the time we had to make this place seem like home. We spent the day bringing over box after box; Dad was out getting pizza for dinner while I started to unpack. With the kitchen finished first, everything is put away and I hung up a few things, hopefully Mom would tell me where she wants the rest. After we ate and listened to some music, I decided to crash in my room. I had made a bed from my blankets and pillows. I was hanging up my clothes in the closet when I came across my computer. I hadn't thought much about it for a while. Truthfully thinking of it only made me think of Emmett, and that made me sad. I needed a distraction, sending the letter only opened up the hurt feelings I had. It had only been a few days, and I realized I didn't enclose my current address since I didn't have one at the time. Would he even write back? I knew that the post office would forward our mail but it would take a while. I plugged in the computer, not wanting to get more emo than necessary, Beastie Boys were in order. Pulling out the note that Edward had given to me when he was leaving I decided to email him, we didn't have a home phone yet and I didn't have a cell so email was all I had. It was short and sweet, a quick update on my home situation, and told him Iam obsessed with the Raven thanks to him, and listening to the Beastie Boys. I shut down my computer as soon as I sent the email. I tried to sleep, I had a busy day coming up, the movers would finish the job we started today, then grocery shopping and visiting Mom.

Sighing as I lay on the floor looking for some perspective on my current situation. First, our new home, the apartment it was nice enough and once all of our things were in and the three of us were together home is exactly what it would be. Mom, she was getting stronger and finding her old self in her new situation, things were looking up, it will be hard for her but I know her spirit is stronger than her current circumstance. Dad, seeing him smile and that we were listening to music, made my heart warm. Light seemed to filling in some of the darkness he was carrying since the accident. As for me, I had changed so much in the last few months, skating, the accident, living with Alice, meeting Edward. What could I say, some years you don't feel any different on your birthday, however this year I have noticed big changes. Just a few weeks to go till my birthday, I have never spent one anywhere but the shore, would this year be my first one away?

EM POV

Broken, that is how I felt, in all of my attempts to contact Bella. Spending the entire month of June stalking her house didn't help the situation. Mom and I had cleaned up the yard, worked the gardens, and raked the rocks. I wanted her to smile when she saw the house. Why hasn't she come yet, they never took this long to show up. Dad had opened up the house like he does every year. No word from the Swan's at all, now it is the last day of June. I am leaving for football camp in the morning. Riley has promised to do what he can, watch for her listen to see if our Dad hears anything. I even gave him my password so he could check my mail for me. I am desperate, it's been months and the only thing that got me thru was that I knew the first of June would come and she would be here and we could go back to being friends at least. I have to believe she would let me clear up the obvious confusion over that one day. Speaking of one day how could she treat me like this over one day, I know how bad that day was but how long have we been friends, the longer I thought about it the madder I was. Now I am stuck going to camp and I am going to have to block this out. I can't show any weakness at camp.


	17. Chapter 17

BPOV

July is half over already, Mom is home. It was a rough start, Dad picked her up from the rehab, got her in the house, ordered take out, and took me food shopping while she rested. We smiled and ate quietly, and then all went to sleep early. In the morning I woke up to the sounds of my sweet Mom cursing as she tried to get ready for her first out-patient rehab session. Walking into her room I am trying not to laugh as she is in her chair covered by only a towel. She is wet and pissed off. I wordlessly help her pick out her clothes, and help her get dressed. I wheel her back to the bathroom and help her while she dries her hair; I set up her basic make up, and her tooth-brush and tooth paste. Once she has dried her hair I start to make small talk with her trying to distract her from her stress and sadness. This kind of chat is what I have missedd. She smiles at me and grabs my hand. She sends me away telling me to fix some breakfast. Flipping on the lights in the kitchen I notice a note on the frig from my Dad, he apologized for leaving so early, but also said he would not be home tonight. I know he is avoiding us already; he helped get Mom home and then promptly dumped her in my lap. I feel like shouting that I am just a kid but she is trying so hard, how can I not be what she needs me to be. So here I am in this wheel chair friendly apartment, with my stressed out Mom, and we need to find a way to get her to therapy today. I know that we could walk to the rehab place it is close and it is a nice day. I lay out the fruit and yogurt and granola that I know my Mom loves and start the tea water and run to get quick shower and get dressed. Packing a bag my ipod, new journal, and snack for us and a couple of waters we are ready for the day. Today is supposed to be an easy one for her just so she gets used to the set up and her physical therapist will be there to show us around. As I close the frig and carry her tea to her at the table she is reading the note. She asks me sit and is trying to gather her thoughts.

"Bella, I don't think we are going to see too much of your Dad, I know this has been so hard and unfair to you. I want you to be a kid and have a life and if you can just help me get started I promise to work everyday on making your life as normal as possible." She grabs my hand again and says "I have known for a little while that your Dad has become someone else recently, this accident has changed us all but you and I are strong and we will be a team, your Dad can't handle the new situation. I love him and I want him to be alright but he is pissing me off, the way he dropped you off at Alice's house and hasn't been there for you is unacceptable. Things are going to change we need a new normal and give me until school starts and I promise we will have it."

She is my rock again and I know we can do this. "Mom, you scared me in the beginning you weren't yourself, but now that we are together again I know we can do this, just tell me what you need me to do and I will."

"I know you will baby, now today we will have to walk to my session but I will find out what our options are and I can go back to work as soon as I can get there so let's just play it by ear and take it one day at a time. Now let's get going, it's a day and we are seizing it."

The day passed by quickly, Mom's new therapist Leah, is awesome, she gave us a ride home and even came in and helped us out by setting up stuff in the easiest possible way for Mom. She gave me some pointers on getting Mom in and out of the chair and the shower and offered to help us find a service to get us to and from places. At dinner that night I felt so much better, we had a plan Mom was going to work at the end of the week just to visit and see how she could fit into the schedule of art classes they had in session. Being independent for the first time in months was great for her spirit and she was doing a great job of getting stronger. Over dinner I filled her in on me, the Emmett situation, and Edward, she insisted that I get a cell phone, I needed one now so she could get a hold of me and I her. So we ordered it online, Mom asked if I knew why Em stopped emailing me and I told her about giving Dad my password and him telling me I didn't have any email, and of course the internet ban at Alice's. She wheeled back to the desk and had me pull up my email account and showed me how to check my deleted mail. I nearly fell off the chair. Pages and pages of email from Emmett, all deleted and I never thought of looking at my deleted mail. Mom must know more about Dad's weirdness than she is letting on.

"I think your Dad may have some explaining to do when we catch up with him again. Until then I will give you some privacy to read these, come in my room if you need to talk, Ok?" I just nodded. "I can't even begin to tell you how sorry I am for what he did, I know he thinks you are too young for a relationship but this is out of line."

What a difference today made, Mom was singing to herself as she got ready for bed, no more tears and yelling. And I am still stunned at the amount of emails Em sent when I thought he hadn't sent any. I frantically started at the top clicking open the first one and began reading. He must really hate me I haven't written back to any of these. I read the first one and started to cry. I missed him so much and I had so much to say to him and I can only hope he would hear me out. I decided to email him right away and tell him what happened and let him know that I was just reading them all right now and I can't wait to talk to him and I wish I could see him and that I rambled on and on about how I missed him and I would tell him all the things that happened as soon as I could talk to him.

Tired didn't even begin to describe how I felt, I read most of the night, that is how many emails this beautiful boy wrote to me, and yes at the end they were a bit desperate and angry but he had every right to be, I needed to talk to him ASAP. I am waiting for Mom to shower and then I will borrow her phone to call him. I pray he will want to talk to me. I don't know if he is home from camp yet or not but I have to try.


	18. Chapter 18

BPOV

Waiting for Mom to finish getting ready was agonizing, but she was doing everything herself using the tricks Leah showed her. I know she will feel empowered because of this. My day would be the best in a while, Mom is back to being my Mom, and I am going to call Em and make him listen to me. No matter what I need the chance to explain and beg him to listen.

I decide to shower and get dressed while I wait. Walking into the kitchen Mom is singing while digging around in the Frig for omelet ingredients.

"Watcha doin Mom?"

"Making my baby a good breakfast."

"Mom I need to use your phone, do you think it is too early to call Emmett?"

"No it's not that early, and my phone is on the table. What did you find out in your emails?"

"Too much to tell you now after I call I will fill you in."

The phone was like a hot potato in my hands; I could hardly dial the number I had scribbled down from one of the emails. It began to ring and my stomach was in my throat. So much time had passed so many things could have happened. Why wouldn't he be with Rose by now, I had ignored him and he had no idea what I was going through, and Rose was more than happy to wait for him and follow him around at school. School he is with her everyday, it was easy for her to be there for him she knew what he was going through. By the third ring I thought I might pass out or start hyperventilating. The sound of Mrs. McCarty's voice was sweet when she picked up.

"Mrs. McCarty, this is Bella from next door, well I was wondering if I may speak to Emmett? It is really important and I was hoping he was there."

"Good morning Bella, how are you? How are your Mom and Dad? We are missing you Swan's this summer."

"I'm sorry Mrs. McCarty, my parents are fine, well not really but I'm not trying to be abrupt but is Emmett there, may I speak to him?"

"No sweet heat Emmett is at football camp for another few days, and Riley is out in the boat, what do you mean your parents are not fine we haven't heard from any of you and we are all worried."

"I will let my Mom explain, but could you please tell Riley hello for me and please this is so important, please tell Emmett I am sorry and to read his email. I sent him one explaining the last few months."

"Ok sweets I will be happy give your messages to the boys, now let me speak to your Mom."

Mom and Mrs. McCarty were on the phone for over an hour. I was picking at my omelet Mom made me while she went into her room and closed the door. When she was done she found me in my room sprawled out on my bed writing in my journal listening to music to suit my mood. She had as sympathetic look on her face.

"I think Em has been missing you as much as you are missing him, if what his Mom says is true. He has been lost without you. I am so sorry we can't go to the shore this summer. Now tell me what he said to you in the emails it took you all night to read, and what on earth are you listening to? This is not going to improve your mood my love."

"Oh Mom, he is sounded so mad in the last few emails, I don't blame him, from what he knew about what is going on I was just ignoring him. I am so mad at Dad, and confused about what to do. My birthday is coming up and I never spent it anywhere but the shore, and I have heard from Alice since Dad picked me up. What is going on and why is my life so complicated? and Radiohead is what is playing."

I changed the play list to the Beatles; I know how much Mom loves the Beatles. She motions for me to come closer to her so I scoot off my bed and kneel in front of her chair and lay my head on her lap. She kissed her fingers and touched my temple and began to stroke my hair.

"I wish I could cuddle you better my love, things are complicated for sure some of it is teenage angst, some is from a meddling although well-intentioned Father, and accident which was out of all of our control. Hang in there, even though you are wise beyond your years you are young. You have way too much on your plate right now, but things will mellow out and pieces will fall into place. Your life as a whole is not determined by today or this year even. Try to be patient I know that it is hard but even though all of our actions matter this last few months is not your only chance. "

She is right of course, we hugged it out and she told me to take a deep breath and go wash my face. We were going to the Art studio today so she can get that part of her life back on track. I felt the turmoil of our current life still but Mom was starting to find herself piece by piece. We still haven't heard anything from Dad, even though I know Mom is sad and missing him. She knows that him being in the same location with us wouldn't make things better right now. He is not the man he was before the accident. After we arrived back home, we ordered pizza. I checked my emails and found one from Riley he promised to talk to Em as soon as he can and told me to hold on a few more days. I also had an email from Edward. He emailed me his login name for chatting in case I am interested. So I added him to my chat list and sure enough he was on line. We spent two hours chatting back and forth, he is so easy to talk to and we never discuss my family situation. Mostly we talk about music and books and what we want to do in the future. I haven't given it much thought before now, but he is older and has to think about it. He wants to go to college in NYC and join a band. He loves to play guitar. I tell him that I am getting a cell phone soon and he promises to play for me once we can talk on the phone. I am so exhausted from my day so we both sign off; I am laying in bed thinking about the books Edward told me about. I must have fallen asleep because before I know it I hear Mom's shower on and she is singing Casey Jones. I immediately think of the shore and Em, I had gone the whole night without thinking about him. It was weird all I was thinking about is Edward. I need to talk to Em, and Alice.

**A/N: Thank you to everyone who is reading, welcome to all the new readers. Thank you Cutestkidsmom, you rock! If you are not reading her stories Because of a boy, and Salacious, you should be, truly amazing. A special note of thanks to all who review or the few who do, I read them and respond to all that I can. Don't worry we get a little Emmett point of view finally in the next chapter. I hope I will see you there. Join me on Twitter and Facebook check out my bio to find the links. Bb73**


	19. Chapter 19

EMPOV

Football camp that is my location, it is also my mind-set; I can't allow myself to weaken by thinking of home. I have turned off my cell phone Mom gave be before I left. I check it once every other day. All I have had so far are voice mail encouragement from Dad, texts from Mom, telling me she misses me and that she is proud, Riley has sent one text everyday and it is always the same "no news". What is it people say, no news is good news, well I do not agree. I am angry which may be helping me here, as a football player/camp attendee I am on fire. The feed back I am getting is great; I am loosing myself in drills and scrimmages. I eat sleep and practice with the guys I will be playing with in high school, and practice begins three days after I get back. Here it is slightly easier to immerse myself in the day-to-day and not think about my feelings and worries.

After dinner I turn my phone on, it's our free time the other guys are talking on their phones listening to music and goofing around. I check my messages for the last time before Saturday. Tomorrow my family will come here and watch us scrimmage one last time and then we will head home. Tuesday I am officially a high school football player with two a day practices and no life other than sleep, eat, practice, throw up, and repeat.

The first thing I do is listen to Dad's voice mail it's much the same as the rest but his voice sounds funny, maybe it's because I am coming home but something is off, so I delete it and move on to my texts. One everyday from Mom, the last one tells me to check my email, I can't but why would she tell me to, I hurry to check Riley's please please please be what I want to hear. Riley sent this text.

_Hey, Mom spoke to your girl today, she sent you an email, I didn't read it but something big is going on, talk to Mom. See you Saturday._

I am bobbling the phone trying to dial my Mom's number. Voicemail really! I can't win, I text Riley, no answer, what the hell. The lights out announcement is usually a comfort, that means I can finally rest, but tonight I am pissed. I want to get in touch with someone who can tell me something. I've turned my phone back over to the office like we all do every night and head off to bed. I can't sleep, shocking; tons of scenarios are going through my head something big? What could it be, and obviously she still isn't at the shore. I tell myself the sooner I get this scrimmage over with I can see my parents and finally get some answers.

The morning takes forever to get here, we are all up packed dressed and now eating breakfast. Right after we will split into two teams and dress for the scrimmage. None of us see our families until after the scrimmage. All I know is I am going to do everything in my power to get this over as fast as possible.

I see my family as we line up on the side of the field, Riley looks as anxious to get to me as I am to get to them. The whistle blows and before I know it, the buzzer is sounding and the game is over. There are announcements about lunch being served and the players meeting up with the families in the cafeteria. On my way into the locker room to shower the coaches pull me aside and tell me I played like I was a man possessed today and to keep it up and maybe I could play varsity by fall. I hear them but I am trying to get past them politely. Possessed is an understatement, this is 7months of pent-up frustration.

I'm first out of the showers and out of the locker room, Dad sees me and hugs me tight. Mom is teary and patting my back as she hugs me, Riley is just standing there with a blank expression.

"Mom, I missed you guys too but what is going on with Bella please, I can't wait anymore." Dad puts his hand on my shoulder and asks if I want to skip lunch and head out. No words were even exchanged Riley picked up my bags and we were on the way to the car. Riley hands me a letter from Bella, it's weird and cold and not like her, I stuff it in my bag I hope Mom can tell me what has happened.

As soon as our seatbelts were on Mom begins to fill me in on what she knows. There was an accident; the words are bouncing around my head. The story is not really clear to me but I know she is alright at least. The ride home is long and I can't stop fidgeting, I have to get to the computer to see what her emails say. Once we are in the house, I turn the computer on; it is the longest minute of my life.

The first email, just says that she didn't get these until last week. What the hell how did that happen. I keep reading, my heart is in my throat, I need details, and there is a reply from her for every email I sent. Skipping ahead to the end I read the last one, she is desperate to talk to me, she just got a cell phone of her own and she gave me the number. Riley has just caught up to me and is in the hallway, running past him I am trying to get my bag it has my phone in it. Dad snags me by the arm.

"Emmett, I don't know how much you know, but the Swan's aren't doing so well, Rene is pretty bad off and Charlie is hiding in the city. That is about all I know but your Mom and I are going up to see them tomorrow, Bella doesn't know but Rene and your Mom already discussed it. We are going to see if we can help at all, so I figure you want to go right? We are leaving at 7 be ready."

"I'm ready let's leave now."

"Son, listen there is a lot going on we don't know what we are walking into, talk to Bella don't tell her we are coming up but be kind to her, she is carrying a lot of responsibility right now."

"Dad don't worry I am calling her now, I want to help any way I can."

I already memorized the number so as soon as my phone is on I'm dialing and walking out to the dock. Sitting down the phone is ringing, the third ring and her voice is the best thing I have heard in months. As soon as I say hello she starts to cry, I hate it when she cries. We talked for hours only stopping when Dad calls me in for the night; I call her right back after I close the door to my room. She tells me everything, almost day by day. My heart is breaking for her; I can't remember all the anger I felt anymore. All I can do is wait to hold her in my arms and break the distance that has hurt both of us.

In the car Mom and Dad fill us in on the situation. They are staying in the apartment because Rene is still wheelchair bound and they are stranded because she can't drive. Mom is teary eyed the whole drive. How can I leave her at the end of the day that is what I am thinking, Dad parks and Riley and I are the first out of the van, knocking on the door before the van is even shut off. The door opens slowly, I smell candles and hear the Beatles, and I see her for the first time in months, she smiles so wide. Riley scoops her up first, as soon as he puts her down, it's my turn to hug her tight and I carry her into the house. I may never let go of her again.

**I loved all the responses from the last chapter, things are moving along now. Thank you all for reading and reviewing, or just reading ( I do it too). It warms my heart and keeps me wanting to write more. I hope you are enjoying it too! Well we are caught up on dates now they are at the same point again. We shall see next chapter the visit and getting to her Birthday! Bb73**


	20. Chapter 20

RPOV

We are on our way home from a long emotional day. Mom is staring out the window while dad quietly rants about Charlie or the lack of him. Emmett is furiously texting Bella. I am listening to music and trying to get a handle on what I learned today compared to what I thought was going on for the last few months.

Once we were in the house and we had each hugged Bella and Renée we sat in the tiny living room while they filled us in on the events from the accident up to the present. Charlie seems to be MIA from guilt and his own stupidity. But Renée isn't focused on that; she wants to take care of herself and her daughter, and most importantly for Bella's life to be back to normal as much as possible. We spent the day talking. Our Mom's cried and hugged a lot. Emmett just stared at Bella and he was touching her the entire time. He was either holding her hand or had his arm around her. I was stunned several times with all that Renée had gone through to get to where she is now. Being unable to drive and Bella not being old enough was a big problem for them. They had made friends with the physical therapist who helped out with rides and had introduced them to the van service which they used when they could. Today was intense for everyone. The Swan and McCarty families have been close since we pulled up to our new home at the shore. The accident has completely changed their family for ever.

When it was time for lunch, Renée needed a break from all the heavy discussions. My Mom was empathetic to everything Renée was going through and how she wanted Bella to be able to relax. Emmett was in a trance for sure. I was stunned repeatedly at all the stuff going on at once. Then there was my Dad, he was livid, furious, that Charlie was not there, that he had become a ghost parent and husband even before Renée came home the hospital. I could actually see him steaming up several times this morning, each time my Mom would just rest her hand on his arm and he would start to settle down. When we decided to break for lunch the Mom's were off to the kitchen to whip up something for us to eat. Dad was inspecting the apartment and trying to see what he could do to make things easier for Renée for when she is alone. Bella Emmett and I went in her room to listen to music.

I was snooping around her room looking at Charlie's albums she had stacked in the corner. Emmett had sat back on her bed in the corner and she was next to him. He had her in his arms and was whispering into her hair as she cried. I know she was trying to be strong for her Mom and that she really hasn't been able to talk to anyone about all of this heavy shit she has on her mind. I started to play Joanie Mitchell album and she looked up and smiled at me. Hey she was my friend too I knew her better than my brother sometimes. I noticed her cell phone on her desk. She asked me to program our numbers into it for her. She wasn't used to having it yet. So I went to work putting all of our numbers in, while I was doing that I noticed some texts from someone named Edward. I don't know what he was to her, but after snooping a bit his texts seemed pretty straight forward. He seemed like he was trying to impress her. I hope this wasn't serious I don't think my brother will survive another bought of Bella ignoring him. He was clearly in love with her. I hope this works out. We are all so young, but their connection is strong anyone could see it.

We ate and joked about the shore. It was nice all of us together again. Now if we were just at the shore. Bella's birthday was coming up Mom asked her what she wanted and she said she already had it. I guess she meant Emmett. I bet she would love to be at the shore, I know for a fact she always spent her birthday at the shore. She quickly changed the subject asking Emmett about football. He was about to start his first official high school practices. Camp was over and the two a day practices were ready to begin. He was excited and nervous, camp went well but this next phase meant more because it was his team only and his level of play would determine if he started or not. Dad also had him so focused on getting scholarships for college he was a wreck. I'm glad I played the drums Dad didn't care about them at all so no pressure for me. Bella hung on every word he said, staring at him just the same as he was staring at her. Cute or creepy? It's a fine line if you ask me.

After we were done eating and the three of us had cleaned up, Dad slipped me some money and told us to get some ice cream. We headed out and walked a few blocks to the ice cream place. We sat and ate ours first and talked about Bella living with Alice. She then told us about Alice meeting Jasper on their trip to her Grandma's, and that she had met his cousin Edward. Emmett tensed a little when she was talking about him. She was still holding his hand and looking directly at him. I took that moment to order the ice cream for our parents while they talked. Walking back I think he was even closer to her than he was on the way there.

To say he was destroyed when it was time to leave would be a understatment. Our parents had talked while we were gone and were planning something. Hugs all around again, and Dad and I went out to start the car, Mom lingered with Renée Emmett lingered with Bella. As they closed the door Dad pulled away.

A/N Sorry for the delay, no real excuse just the busy life of a working Mom of two. I hope this quiets your fears for them for a bit, I hope to write again sooner than later.

Bb73


	21. Chapter 21

Renee POV

As I lay in bed this morning I am thinking of so many things, and trying desperately to get my thoughts together. I need them to become a plan and not just wishes. Unfortunately for me being stuck in this chair is leaving so much more up in the air. I no longer can just wait for Charlie to swoop in and organize this mess we are in.

Charlie, lets start with him; he has been the greatest love of my life. We were so magical together, he was so business minded and matter of fact, and I am spirited and abstract. We always fit; our dating and early married life was bliss. On paper we didn't make any sense, but in person we just worked. His pre planned organized life was my rock and I floated around him and his plans like air. The one thing I felt strongly about was that we were vital to each other. Once we married and Bella was born I knew I could never live without him. He was only comfortable with a staunch rigid plan and that same plan was the reason I could be myself and live my life purely by the way I felt at that moment. He worked so hard to give his girls the best life he could. Bella wanted for nothing, I was able to open the Art studio with my friends and work when I wanted to, or just paint if I wanted to. Now he is gone, he left me broken-hearted and alone to fend for myself. He was my great protector and now I have to protect Bella. She is slipping into her Father's role and I don't want her to have to sacrifice one more thing. I also needed to find a way to be without Charlie, I don't know if he is coming back but I do know he is not here now.

Financially we are scraping by, Charlie won't return our calls or come home. But he does pay our bills I never see any and there is some money in our account for food. The money I make from the studio is just is collecting in my personal savings. I think I know what I want it for now but I am trying to think ahead and be cautious. Which is the hardest thing for me, it goes totally against the grain for me. My questions to answer are how long will Charlie continue to put money in the account and if he does stop how will I survive? Not to mention, how can I get Bella back to being a kid. She has been so strong and so mature, helping me everyday. Leaving the only home she has ever known. Staying with her friend's family. I know how hard not having her "brothers McCarty" to talk to and escape with has been on her. At the moment I have to do the one thing I never do and make a plan. The only possession I really have is the shore house. It was my Mothers before me and is only in my name. Charlie pretty much owned everything else. The studio is a shared venture with my two friends. They know I won't be able to work there again. I love going in and helping out when I can but right now I need to focus on Bella and myself. The good news is the studio is doing well and as a now silent partner, I can continue to collect my third of the profit.

My big relief today is that after a hard week of therapy and Bella and I bonding again the McCarty's are coming. It will be so nice to talk to people who knew me before the accident and I know they are true friends and can help me figure out what to do next. No matter what direction my thoughts take me, I always end up with the same answer, the shore.

Laying in bed dwelling on my problems wasn't going to solve anything; it's time to get this day started. Showered and dressed I am in the kitchen making coffee when Bella walks in looking really sleepy.

"Good morning my beauty how did it go with Emmett on the phone last night? How long did you two talk?"

"Emmett was great, and most of the night, I had to catch him up, he really didn't know anything that happened, and Dad sabotaging my emails really made things worse. And good morning to you too, you look like you again Mom."

I know she is referring to the way I am dressed, I have been so caught up in other people helping me or trying to be practical about how I dress that I have not worn any of my usual clothes for months. She was right as always I even felt more like me today, the new me the in control me. I encouraged her to get showered and dressed for the day and that we might have company coming over. She never even asked just stole my toast and headed back to her room. Not long after that the door bell rang and I called out to her to see who it was. I quickly wheeled into the living room so I could see her face when she opened the door. I was not disappointed when she saw both Riley and Emmett, the smile she had was beyond any I had seen from her in months. Riley hugged her sweetly and as soon as he put her down and he moved on to me, Emmett hugged her so tight lifting her up he carried her further into the living room. You could see he was whispering something to her and she was nodding her head as she continued to press her face into his shoulder. I actually had tears in my eyes before I was surrounded by McCarty love. The McCarty's were here, and even if it was for a small amount of time all seemed right.

Between Bella and I, we filled them in on every turn of even starting from the accident till today. Joe ever the strong Husband and Father was visually up set by the lack of Charlie in our current situation. Not that I was thrilled but I have been watching him pull away little by little for months. Ann could sense the fatigue from the emotional discussions of the morning so she suggested that she and I make some lunch and the kids could go and hang out alone while she sent Joe in search of ways to make things easier for Bella and I around the house. I had not really thought about how handy Joe is and how he could probably help me find ways to do more for myself. Ann and I were alone in the kitchen when she finally opened up to the questions she really wanted me to answer.

"Ok Renee, now you know I am here for you so pleases tell me why you never called me? All those months and no word, then the summer came around and still no word? What is going on here, and what is really going on with Charlie, how is it he can walk away from you two?"

"Are you done with the rapid fire, lets take the easy one first, Charlie, I have no idea what the hell he is doing, he feels responsible for the accident and he freaked out and can't deal with it so he is hiding out in the city. Why didn't I call you, well first off I was out of it for a while and I hardly knew what was going on with Bella, between the meds and the depression, I was a mess still kind of am I guess. I am sorry maybe if I had called you Bella wouldn't have been so pushed aside. Oh Ann, I have to figure out how to get her happy again, I need your help it's her Birthday soon and I have to find a way to get her to the shore. Can you help me?"

She put her hand on mine and assured me she wouldn't leave until we had it all under control. She fixed sandwiches for everyone and put out all the food and called everyone back to the table. As we all sat together eating and talking about what Bella wanted for her birthday and how Emmett did at football camp. Soon we were all done and the kids were cleaning up. Joe pushed me through the apartment showing me the few little things he tweaked to make things more accessible to me and easier for Bella as well. When the kids finnish Joe sends them to get ice cream for all of us while Ann pushed me back to the living room. The three of us were alone and Ann began to tell Joe what we were talking about in the kitchen.

"Joe, Renee wants to get Bella down to the shore for her birthday. With our mini van it shouldn't be an issue to get them both there but her house is not exactly wheel chair ready, any thoughts on that?"

" Not an issue at all I have a week so I can make some quick changes and have it ready by her birthday, how about Riley and I come and pick you ladies up and meanwhile my lovely wife can get things ready to get our girl Bella her happy birthday. Renée have you thought about making any permanent changes to the shore house because if I had a few months I could make the den and small downstairs bath into a suite that would accommodate your chair and I can easily change the doors so the living room, kitchen and deck will be no problem for you to get around on, and the front steps could easily be a ramp."

"Wow, Joe that all sounds great, but I don't have a lot of money saved, I was really hoping you could make the shore house a possibility for us again, I know I miss it and Bella, well not only is she in desperate need of the water and the beach but to be closer to her friends."

Tears were already silently falling from my eyes, I had wished but wasn't sure if the changes I needed would be possible for our beloved shore house. Joe had me convinced that we would live there comfortably.

"Renée, I am bored out of my mind lately all the houses are open for the summer and most people only want me to do repairs in the winter so I have lots of time on my hands, so you just cover what you can of the materials and we will take care of the rest. It's the least we can do, Ann really needs her friend to sit out back and drink wine with her, and the boys are so busy with their own lives we just sit around looking at each other, really you would be saving our marriage if you came down for a while."

We all laughed at how dramatic he made it all sound. I can't believe we could be at the shore in just a week. Bella would be so much happier. This is the longest she has been away from the water and beach and her beloved dock. Maybe things will brighten up after all. The kids came back and we all said our goodbyes. Riley and Joe went out to the van to start it, and Ann hugged me again assuring me she would take care of everything and all I had to do was get ready to go and then just relax. As she walked toward the door I caught a glimpse of the sadness on Bella and Emmett's faces, their connection gets stronger and stronger all the time.

That night as I lay in bed, I felt content for the first time in a while, the shore was the answer to many of our problems and concerns, and the McCarty's are great friends. Bella would be happy; we would be back to our happy place even it is only for a short time.

A/N I hope this answers some of the questions. I also hope it wasn't too choppy for my guest reviewer, Birthday fun at the shore soon! Maybe we can find out what Em was whispering to our Bella.


	22. Chapter 22

BPOV

I know that Mom wanted to keep my birthday plans a surprise as long as she could but I talk to Emmett every night. I knew his Dad and Brother were spending every waking second for the past week at our shore house getting it ready for Mom. I would be excited just to go to the shore but to spend time with Emmett and Riley, and the fact that Mom would be in her own home again and be able to get around. I could tear up just thinking about it.

Alice had called the yesterday to wish me a happy birthday, and make sure I had something fun planned. She was going to visit her Gram and I'm invited to go if I wanted to. I know she is really going to spend time with Jasper so she wasn't too disappointed that I wasn't coming. School would start soon and we would be together every day again.

So today is my Birthday, it is usually bitter-sweet. It generally marks the end of summer fast approaching. However knowing that I get to be at the shore until school starts, makes this birthday seem like a beginning not an end. I started my day by logging into the computer to check my mail. Even though I will see them today both Em and Riley have sent me Happy Birthday emails. I still haven't heard from Edward. We have been emailing and texting sporadically. Is he back home for school or maybe he is with Jasper still, I'm not sure. I am so glad I met him it's so easy to talk to him about books and music, I am very curious about the music he listens to. He only knows the person I have become since Mom's accident, which is weird for me, Em is just getting to know that version of me. Even though he knows me so well and has for a few years now, I enjoy my relationships being so different with them both. So no email from Edward, oh well maybe he forgot he is so busy. I will be good old Bella by the end of the day and probably won't even think of him again until I get back.

It's Saturday so the traffic won't be as bad as a Friday, which I am grateful for, I couldn't sleep all night. I had to distract myself from keeping Em up any later. He has practice most of today, so he definitely needed the rest. Riley and his Dad will be here around 10. I can hear Renée singing The Birthday song by the Beatles while she is getting ready this morning; we are both in need of this time away.

"Bella" Mom calls out to me, I run into her room eyes wide hoping everything is alright.

She begins to sing happy birthday to me as loud as she can. I am always embarrassed when she sings like this thankfully we are alone.

"I will give you all of your Birthday surprises at the shore, okay sweetie? I can't wait for us to be there basking in some sun and being near the water. We could both use it right about now. Please make sure everything is closed up since we will be gone a couple of weeks if all goes well. I will meet you in the living room."

Having packed and re packed and straightened up everything twice. I have double checked that everything is off and taken out the garbage. Nothing left to do but wait. I am about to log into my computer again when the door bell rings. Jumping at the sound makes my Mom laugh out loud, clearly my excitement is not contained well. I open the door to find Riley grinning wide and holding his hand out to me.

"Your chariot awaits ladies; now point me in the direction of your belongings so I can escort you to the van."

"Really Riley, just get out-of-the-way boy." Mr. McCarty pushes his way in and hugs me and wishes me a happy Birthday, and proceeds to hug Mom and start pushing her towards the door.

Joe has no trouble at all getting Mom into the van and comfortable and folding her chair up putting it into the back of the van with our stuff. I am all cozy in my seat with a bag marked Bella's Birthday treats which Riley has handed to me. I quickly observe some of my favorite snacks and card from Ann, as I reach the bottom of the bag I find an I pod with a note that says listen to me taped to it. Riley instructs me to have some snacks his Mom sent and listen to the Em's I pod he sent with some songs loaded on it for me. He takes his copilot seat and we are off to the Parkway in search of our Exit 63 salvation.

As we pass the exit for Seaside, Mom grabs my hand. We are dangerously close. The music that Em loaded for me was my favorites for our shore trip. Beach Boys, Beatles and the Grateful Dead, added at the end some Dave Mathews Band. I know from our recent talks that they are Em's favorite now.

The sign for Exit 63 is in sight and the four of us cheer. I don't know what the McCarty's usually do but the Swans always cheer the sign. Now that we are on route 72 the windows are down, I feel the breeze and smell the salty air. As we drive east it's as if the water is pulling me closer like a magnet. Each time we stop at a light I hear the loud calls of seagulls all around us. I close my eyes and try to absorb all the things I have missed so much. As we pull into the driveway Mom has tears in her eyes as she sees our garden had been tended and a ramp is in place and it doesn't look the least bit out-of-place, in fact it looks as if it has always been there. Before Joe can open the back to get out Mom's chair Ann is out and hugging her fiercely. Riley and I gather up the bags and we are off to explore. Joe and Ann are helping Mom into her chair and wheeling her up to the door which has changed so the locks are lowered so Mom has no trouble at all opening it up.

"So welcome home to Casa de Swan ladies, I hope you like it. Renée try everything out and let me know if anything needs to change, I have a few more changes I want to make while you are here to get your input."

Mom can't even speak she is so over whelmed; she squeezes his hand and gives him a watery smile, and the same for Ann. Ann has opened everything up for us so the breeze is blowing in off the bay and candles are lit on the mantle, and sliding glass door that used to open up to the deck is now double French doors with the molding tilted so it is easily access by a wheel chair. Joe takes Mom on a tour of her room and bathroom while Ann is squeezing the life out of me and wishing me a happy birthday. Riley has taken all of our things in and put mine in my room.

Before I know it we are all on the deck warm breeze on my face and subs from the world's best sub shop on our table. Everyone is talking around me but I am stuck in my own thoughts and just basking in all warmth and smells and sounds of our shore house. I can't believe I haven't thought of this before now but I suddenly open my eyes and the look on my face gives me away. It just now dawned on me, I haven't heard from my Dad. I know he is weird ed out right now but why wouldn't he call or come home for my Birthday? Mom is eyeing me closely while I am processing my distress.

"Bella sweets what is that look for; we are here your happy place, what has your face so scrunched?"

"Dad"

"Ah Bella, sweets, I am sure he just got busy, he will call I am sure of it. Riley weren't you just saying that you wanted to take Bella for a ride in the boat before Em gets home?"

He nods his head and leads me out to the boat; I am still a bit out of it. I can't believe I hadn't thought of it earlier. Before I know it we are riding slowly through the lagoons, the no wake zone is a great place to talk.

A/N Sorry for the delay, life is a bit much right now, but I think I might get a couple chapters out this week. I hope you like it and I promise Bella and Em next time. Thank you for reading!


	23. Chapter 23

BPOV

Riding thru the lagoons is very relaxing; I almost forgot how peaceful the slow-moving boat on the calm lagoon water was. After twenty minutes of riding I turned to Riley and thank him, he just smiles and nods. We chatted a bit on the way back home, nothing to heavy until we have sight of the dock.

"Bella just remember how many people want to swarm you with love and attention and try not to focus on the one who isn't."

I smile and nod back. Very wise this pseudo big brother I have here. As I turn back around and move to the front of the boat to catch the pole as we coast in. I see him, sitting on the dock, legs dangling in the water. His hair is wet; his arms are bulging from his tank top. He stands a rope in hand ready to throw it to me. I see the biggest smile I have seen in a while; I know mine is a complete match to his. Riley and I tie the boat up quickly and I look up at him as he leans down to give me a hand up on to the dock. If it is possible he is bigger than when I saw him last, and he is hugging me tight as I exhale.

"Rye thanks for looking after my girl."

"Not a problem glad to do it."

Emmett hands me a huge bouquet. They are beautiful, so many flowers all of them bright and colorful. As I am taken by the divine smell and thanking him he is still holding me close. He tips his head to signal me to sit on the dock with him, so of course I do. My smile is still as wide as I lay my head on his arm and sigh again.

"Little Swan, happy birthday! I am so glad you are here. Since you have had your favorite lunch and gone for a ride in the boat what do you say to us going on the island. We can walk on the beach and go to Fantasy Island and walk around the shops and ride the rides. What do you think?"

"Yes please!"

As we hop up and go into the house the adults are all ready to go. I run up to my room to change and freshen up, while they close up the house and get Mom into the van. When I come down stairs Em is waiting for me. He asks me if I want to be with everyone or would I prefer just the two of us. Of course for the first time in a while it would be great to just be us. He tells me to follow his lead and he and Riley will take care of everything.

The ride on to the island is relaxing, we sit in the way back and hold hands. The adults are singing to the oldies station on the radio. This is the most relaxed Mom and I have been since before the accident. The toll the past few months have taken on me is now starting to show. Thankfully I am surrounded by some of my favorite people in my favorite place, I couldn't ask for much more.

EMPOV

I see Riley pulling the boat closer to the dock and I am searching for the stressed out Bella my Mom warned me I might see. She looks relaxed, she looks stunning the sun sparkling off her hair, and her pink cheeks from the wind and the sun. I can't stop the feelings I have for her. They are all-encompassing, almost overwhelming. I am just so happy she is here, and we are finally going to be able to spend some time together. As I reach out to help her on to the dock I feel her soft touch. Instantly I have goose bumps everywhere. How have I made it this long without her here? It seems like a blur now.

She agrees that she wants to be just us for a while so Riley and I have a plan to distract our parents. He is meeting some friends on the island and as soon as Dad parks, he splits off and is off on his first mission. Bella is watching me closely for any sign of what she should do, I just grab her hand as we walk and squeeze is gently. As we get into Bay Village, we pass our parents favorite place for chowder and I suggest they go in to eat. They start to protest because B doesn't like it and it is her birthday.

"Hey B and I are going to grab some pizza and walk around a bit so we will meet you guys back at the van about 11." My Dad starts to point out that on a Saturday night they will never get a table as Riley walks out with his friend Jenny who is the hostess and she gives Riley a huge smile as she points out a perfect table for the three of them by the window overlooking the water. Problem solved. Now we scatter I fist bump Rye and Bella and I cross the street and walk the two blocks to the beach.

As soon as we reach the top of the dune looking down at the water, Bella gives me sweetest grin and starts to run for the water's edge. Even after all this training and running in practice I still lag behind just taken with her excitement. We splash around for a bit and then find the perfect place to sit and listen to the waves for a while. Holding her hand feels better than just about anything right now. Here she is with me we are finally on the same page in one of our favorite places.

Grateful is the best way to describe how I feel when it comes to all the late night phone calls. We have talked about all the miscommunication we have had for the past few months. We talk about how hard high school football practice is, and how sad she is with how her Dad is treating she and her Mom. Her Mom, we almost never discuss how hard it is on her having to be a caretaker. I think if we mention it she may crack. So as long as she wants to avoid it we will. I check my phone and realize we should go back across and get some pizza and check out some shops before it is time to go back to the van.

We are riding home in the back of the van, she has her ankle bracelet she wanted on and she is cuddling the goofy blue bear I won for her. What a different ride this is almost silent. I am just thankful for her being here and we have all day tomorrow together before I have practice on Monday again.

From my window I can see her shadow across the alley between our houses. She is busy moving around her room. I am concentrating on operation cheer up Bella Swan. What will be next.

A/N So not bad right two in one week. I hope you liked it I love hearing from you and love it even if you don't just the thought of people possibly enjoying my story feedback or not, keep reading! I try to respond to everyone who writes me. I'm not perfect but it you take the time to comment I will comment back! I hope Spring has sprung where you are it has here so I am off to soak up some sun with my kids! I will write soon, these two have taken up permanant residense in my head so I will be sharing more soon.


	24. Chapter 24

BPOV

This day has been beyond words. Even though in the back of my mind is the nagging feeling of abandonment, the lack of my Dad on my birthday has been pushed aside. I can wish for things to be different but I will follow my Mom's lead and not push Dad any further. If he wants us he will come around if not, it is his loss.

Laying in my bed, my senses are over whelmed with the windows open I can feel the cool breeze from the front of the house and the scorching heat from the rising sun over the water in the back, I can smell the beautiful flowers Em gave me for my birthday and I hear my Mom who is singing in the kitchen. The tiny heart charm of my other present tickles my ankle as I stand to stretch. With a huge smile on my face I make my way downstairs, to see my Mom with a smile on her face as she whips up some breakfast with ease in our renovated kitchen.

"Good morning Baby, how did you sleep? You looked so happy last night, did you kids have fun? Look at this cool tray Riley made for my chair so I can carry things around and still wheel myself, come out on the deck and eat with me."

"Wow Mom everything looks great, yes I had a perfect time with the guys yesterday. Riley made that tray it's really cool. You seem very chipper too did you have fun yesterday?"

"Oh baby, yes it was so nice to just talk to people and laugh and have some wine and do some of the fun things we love to do every summer, no heavy stuff, and no talk about the accident. Just funny stories and music and being normal for a change. It is great to see you smile and hear you laugh."

We sat there for almost an hour eating and talking and basking in the sunlight, watching the boats going out. I was cleaning up our dishes when I heard the side door open and in walked Ann. She looked like summer with her cute flirty dress and big had and shades.

"Good morning ladies, how did everyone sleep, nothing like chowder, wine and lots of laughs to help me sleep anyway. Rene wants some help getting ready for the flea market, Bella do you want to join us this morning?"

"Sounds good, I will go get ready."

When I came out of the shower I could hear my Mom laughing and talking to Ann, like teenage girls. It makes me smile, and what a huge weight off of me. I don't mind helping my Mom we are a team but it is kind of nice to focus on myself sometimes. I'm listening to my Coltrane/Davis play list sitting in my window seat thinking about Em. He seemed so intense last night. I feel so relieved that we are talking and back to normal but is that what this is normal us, friends, or is it different. I feel the same, more relieved now that I know what it is like to not have him around. But I have to talk to him and see what he is thinking, how he is feeling. I'm in the eighth grade, he is in high school, and we live 2 hours away from one another. Am I too young to have these feelings for him, do I have these feelings, I need Alice. I am not messing up my only full day with Em by discussing this heavy stuff today.

"Bella, we are ready, how about you are you coming along?" Rene is calling me from the living room. She looks just as flirty as Ann; they are too much still giggling about who knows what.

"Yes I will be right down go to the van I will lock up."

As I turn from the front door I see Riley helping my Mom into the van, he is such a cheese he is complimenting the ladies on their sun dresses, I know they love it and really it is sweet. I thought Em would come with us and I must have looked confused because Riley was smirking at me.

"He is in the outside shower he slept in a little bit and missed his chance in the shower, Dad got in there before him, so if he wanted to be ready to go with us he had to take an outside shower. He is planning on coming though don't worry little Swan."

I can hear Em in the shower yelling at us to wait for him. He is having a hard time getting dressed since he is probably still wet, we only use that shower after being outside and I never try to get dressed after I usually just throw on a cover up and run in the house to dry off. I see him stumbling out of the door and trying to get his shirt over his wet body. I can't help but laugh. He looks up and sees me and smiles.

"Glad I could amuse you this morning Ms. Swan. So are we off to the market of fleas?"

He is smirking at me too, as I giggle and hide my face in my hands. It is a short drive but one filled with traffic. Ann parks across the street from the market and Riley and Em both help my Mom out and fight over who pushes her so she can just enjoy the day. Ann and I go and get coffee and waters for everyone, and we start our journey around the outdoor market of food, junk and crafts. The knock off purse booth is a favorite of Mom and me, but it is a little stand with a woman who is sketching from photos that catches Ann's eye.

"Hey Rene, what if you and I set up a booth and sell your paintings here on the weekends? It sounds like fun doesn't it? I'm going in to check on the prices for space want to join me?"

Mom nods her head and I can almost see her brain working away. The boys and I are sent on a mission to pick up some vegetables for dinner later, and Riley is forking out his hard earned allowance on a floating raft thing. Before you know it our Mom's are back and carrying on again, they wave us over they are ready to leave. On the way home we stop and pick up a couple of pizzas and salad. At home Joe has the oldies station on loud and he is working on a ramp for the back deck. The boys eat quickly and start working on inflating the raft and digging up some rope from the shed.

The heat of the day is upon us and our Mom's are in the house working on a plan and cutting veggies for our evening cook out. I'm up stairs changing into my bathing suit and I can hear the boys calling me from the dock. I look out as they both jump onto the raft at the same time they bounce off and it starts to float away. I am doubled over laughing as they try to swim to catch it as it keeps getting further away. Sunday on the bay is no place to be chasing a huge raft towards the channel. Now Joe has joined me as we yell out encouragement to them as they continue to chase the raft.

It's evening now, after retrieving the raft and swimming all afternoon, we had a huge meal with our families and listened to music and shared our shore memories. This was a much needed weekend and break for Mom and me. Now I find myself on my dock of the bay waiting for Em to come and join me, in the background I can hear Riley practicing his drums. I hope I can keep up the courage to talk to Em about us.


	25. Chapter 25

EMPOV

After an amazing day, I was wiped out. Normally on Sundays I would sleep late eat a ton, and nap often. Since I started two a day practices for football, Sunday being the only day with out any practice, Sunday was also my only day of rest. But that all takes a back seat this week. Bella is here, and keeping her smiling is my only goal.

After dinner, Riley and I helped clean up; Bella was cleaning the kitchen, so I went home to shower. When I emerged from the bathroom I passed by Riley's room. He is playing his drums, thankfully he is getting better I'm not even flinching as I listen for a minute.

He looks up and cracks up, it maybe because I am wearing a Mickey Mouse towel around my waist and I have a purple towel twisted up on my head. I slip into my room, sitting on my bed drying my hair with the towel I can feel the day catching up to me. I lay back on the bed thinking I will just rest a minute. I know Bella will be on the dock waiting for me soon, so I will just close my eyes for a minute.

BPOV

The water is gently slapping a rhythm on the poles of the dock, causing the tiniest ripples of water back into the bulk head. The moon is so bright its like a halo over the island, and the bridge has its usual lights up one side. Oddly calming is the sound of the echo on the water of the cars going over the bridge. Riley must have finished for the evening because I can no longer hear the extended drum solo. My heart is in my throat, I know I need to ask Em some questions so I can feel comfortable about what is going on between us. Most girls my age would love to call Em their boyfriend. I never thought of him as anything but my best friend since the first day we met and hugged me even before he knew my name. Growing up with my whimsical Mom, and my practical Dad one theme was universal, stand on your own take care of yourself don't be a follower. When I think of how many times my Dad would see girls while we were out or in a movie and say Isabella don't be that girl. So even now when I can't help but question everything my Dad said or did, I still can hear him saying "don't be that girl".

I don't know why I am even thinking about this, sure Em seems like he is more into me than usual, we were separated without contact for months. Maybe he is just reacting to that, or just that it's my Birthday weekend. I just need to talk to him. I may actually throw up from the feelings that are bubbling up in me as I wait not very patiently on our dock.

Trying to distract myself while I wait I decide to count the cars and on the 23rd car I will go in and scrap this idea of life altering conversations. So here it goes, I start counting quietly out loud, when I get to 20 there is a break in traffic, the light must have turned red again. The crack of the back screen door breaks my concentration, now I am giving myself an internal pep talk. I can hear the foot steps on the rock in the yard now I'm starting to sweat a little as I feel the dock adjust to the added weight of a second person. I look up and see Riley. Trying not to seem as disappointed and surprised as I am, I pat the dock beside me for him to have a seat.

"Not quite the McCarty you were expecting right B." His smile is wide and he is sweaty from playing, He takes a seat next to me and is disturbing the small ripples of water with his monster feet taping at the water.

"I don't think Em is going to be down tonight B, he took a shower and passed out on his bed before he even got dressed." He chuckles to himself and continues. "He isn't used to this much Sunday activity, he usually eats and sleeps only. I can keep you company for a while if you like, I don't have to go to work with Dad until 10."

I accidentally let out a sigh and I am sure my disappointment is not as hidden as I would like it to be. Riley has been a great friend and pseudo big brother, hanging out with him is always filled with easy laughs and practical wisdom.

"Riley McCarty, I would love nothing more than for you to keep me company. I was enjoying listening to you play, are you playing drums at school or just for fun?"

"I haven't decided for this year yet, I tried the marching band, I like the music but the uniform is unacceptable, I also played in the Jazz band for school, and we do concerts, community events and basketball games. That I may still do, and a couple of kids from school and I have been tossing the idea of a garage band around." "Why so glum chum?"

"Silly teen girl musings with deep thoughts and mindless aspirations, that's what is floating around in my head this evening, never mind me." I have sufficiently distracted him with my silliness.

Tapping lightly on my head Riley breaks the inner freak out I am having.

"Sounds crowded up there B, what do you say we call it a night and stop feeding the bug population of Manahawkin."

So with that he hops up and extends his hand to me helping me up. We quietly walk to my back door; he kisses the top of my head.

"Sweet dreams little swan, If it makes you feel any better I haven't seen my brother this happy since last summer when you were here, so sleep on that Miss."

My eyes were closed as soon as I laid my head down on my pillow. I think I heard Em leaving in the morning. I heard some quiet talking and car doors closing. I just couldn't wake up all the way. I guess I will have to wait a bit longer to talk to Em.

A/N I know disappointing but soon they will hash it all out, things never go exactly how you think they will with these two. But I don't know about you but they never go the way I plan either. I love the reviews and I secretly love knowing that there are people out there reading this story.

Soon very soon.


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